Bufcomments Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 My prayers to you Westie. Sorry to hear about your wife. But yes I agree with DC , leave the internet alone, and be with people you love. That's the best way to deal with it. You cant do it by yourself. I know I lost my father to cancer 2 years ago.
Keukasmallies Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 I agree w/ DC Tom. Use your energy and focus to provide support and strength for your wife in this most difficult of times. Be strong for her.
Security Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 Best wishes sir. Enjoy the time and cherish the memories.
Corp000085 Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 Hey man.. Prayers sent. Now, get off your butt and be with your wife as her life ends. You provide her with comfort; be strong, and do not waiver. Fall apart once she's gone, but not before! And know, in hindsight, you will find peace knowing you walked your wife through death and eased her final worldly pain. When its all over, then you can grieve, but not before!
BarkLessWagMore Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 Westside, my prayers to you for strength and to your wife for peace. The love you have for her and the pain you are in for not being able to ease her suffering just jump off the screen. It is clear from all of your posts that you two have a very special marriage and, in time, I hope that is what you will remember. You were BLESSED to have the time with her that you did. Godspeed.
Doc Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 My condolences. Stay strong for both your sakes. The pain will never leave, but will get more tolerable over time.
thebandit27 Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 Thank you all for your kind words. A tumor in her lung is pressing against her vocal chord I was told by the dr. She has lost the ability to speak. What I wouldn't do just to hear her sweet voice one more time. There is a malignet (sp?) mass in her bowels that is causing the blockage. It is inoperable. They said they wouldn't do surgery because her insides is loaded with cancer. They also said, if they could not somehow open the blockage, she could possibly have two weeks. Even if by some miracle they did open it up, she would have maybr two months. I knew deep in my heart that when I called 911 for an ambulance, that she was never coming home again. This question is for someone who has lost a spouse, how do you go on after there gone? I come home to take care of my pets and the house feels so empty. Will the pain ever go away? I watch her laying there, struggeling to breath, watching her waste away.Then I think of all the promises to her these past sixteen months telling her she was going to be ok. I knew they where lies. I never thought it would be so quick. I always thought we would have more time. Please, if you are still reading this. Don't put off that trip, vacation or whatever you and your loved one have been planning to go someday. Because sometimes tomorrow never comes and instead of happy memories, you have a big bag of regrets. Don't make my mistake. Tell your special loved one that you love them. Thank you for letting me vent. I will pray for you and your family. I don't know about losing a spouse, but my mother--married to my father for 41 years--passed away in a tragic accident last summer. It has been excruciating for my father, as he barely remembers life without her. Here is what I can tell you has helped my father: Keep your loved ones close; I don't know if you have children or grandchildren, but get around them as much as possible if you can do so. Talk about her--a LOT. It hurts, but it helps. Learn to do the things she always did--cooking, laundry, shopping--it will remind you of her Talk to her when nobody else is around--you'll be amazed at what this does for you Beyond the devastation, the sorrow, and the pain, there will always be the loving memory of your wife. My best to you.
Rubes Posted February 6, 2014 Posted February 6, 2014 Absolutely heartbreaking. I've dealt with a lot of pain and loss, both personally and professionally, and it never gets any easier for me. Stories like this stir up a lot of emotions. Take everyone's advice and be around as many people as you can.
drinkTHEkoolaid Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 (edited) You and your family are in my prayers. Never say never...after all we are bills fans right? God bless Edited February 7, 2014 by drinkTHEkoolaid
meazza Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I`m really sorry to hear about this I agree with Tom.
Dr. Fong Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Sorry to hear that news. That's a scenario that I have a hard time imagining. My heart truly goes out to you as you struggle through this. I hope that you have some great people in your life that you can rely on. I'm hoping for the best for you and your wife.
DC Tom Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I`m really sorry to hear about this I agree with Tom. Will you people stop agreeing with me, please? It's freakin' me out!
outsidethebox Posted February 7, 2014 Author Posted February 7, 2014 Thank you all for your great advice. There has been so many phone calls, texts, e mails and visitors I haven't had much time to dwell about it. It's just times like now where it is just me and her alone, with her drugged up pretty well that are hard. There are so many kind and caring people on this board, they do help me deal with it easier. Now DCTom, I agree with your grumpy ass 100%. I respect you enough to take your advice to heart. I am not doing the same things when she was hospitalized in december. I go home every night and get some rest. Thank you Tom and everyone else. TBD is the best Bills board in the world.
meazza Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Will you people stop agreeing with me, please? It's freakin' me out! The bro love is freaking you out? TBD is the best Bills board in the world. Fixed.
boyst Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 If it helps and since it seems he wants to help, I can post Beerballs #... I am sure he'd be available to talk any time. The bro love is freaking you out? I think it's hilarious. There are rare occasions when Tom actually shows his real self. I am proud of everyone here for being who they are and the mention of Paul really helped bring it down to an even more heart felt place.
mead107 Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Not the place to read the up dates from every one as I am sitting at work with tears running down my face. I know if anything happened to my wife I would be lost. Hang on and remember all the the little things that you did together. Keep friends and family close. We are all thinking and praying for you.
Wacka Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I know some of what you are going through. My dad died 23 years ago at 60 from lung cancer. My uncle (his B-I-L) was visiting. He had congestive heart failure and also knew he was dying too. I overheard them making a bet about who was going first. They agreed to pay the bet later. Knowing that both could joke about it made me feel better. My uncle lasted about 3 months longer I picture them as drinking beers, smoking cigars and playing cards with another uncle that died in his 40s in the mid 70s from diabetes. He liked them both. They're having fun while waiting for the rest of us. Praying for you and your loved ones.
Chef Jim Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I agree with Tom. We all need to stop agreeing with Tom.
boyst Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 I agree with Tom. We all need to stop agreeing with Tom. who's Tom?
Zona Posted February 7, 2014 Posted February 7, 2014 Payers sent from Arizona. Now be with her and comfort her.
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