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[More Then] 3 Ways To Make A Bruise Go Away Faster


boyst

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I got a giant bruise on the tuchas from cow slamming me against the chute and it looks pretty gnarly and is pretty damn sore. So, with the power of the internet in front of me...I Googled how to make bruises go away. I found this a little bit funny and a little bit wtf.

 

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Bruise-Go-Away-Faster

 

I take 1300mg Vit C a day when immune system is challenged, with L-Lysine. Arnica is rubbed on it every night, and a gentle massage on the edges, too. I could not find any leaches to suck on it and Gugny hasn't returned my calls - so I'm not sure on that one...yet.

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I got a giant bruise on the tuchas from cow slamming me against the chute and it looks pretty gnarly and is pretty damn sore. So, with the power of the internet in front of me...I Googled how to make bruises go away. I found this a little bit funny and a little bit wtf.

 

http://www.wikihow.c...-Go-Away-Faster

 

I take 1300mg Vit C a day when immune system is challenged, with L-Lysine. Arnica is rubbed on it every night, and a gentle massage on the edges, too. I could not find any leaches to suck on it and Gugny hasn't returned my calls - so I'm not sure on that one...yet.

 

"Leeches." You !@#$ing hayseed,.

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Did you at least get dinner out of it before getting slammed? I heard Beerball gives great deep tissue massages. That should work out the kinks in your, um, bruise.

The funny thing about deep tissue massages is that they are not meant to be heavy pressure, that's not what is meant by deep tissue massage. It is supposed to be deep tissues under the major muscles which are at the surface to massage the skeletal and core muscles.

 

I might eat her for dinner. She won the battle, but I'll win the war. MMM cheeseburgers.

 

"Leeches." You !@#$ing hayseed,.

who pissed in your cornflakes?
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This past summer we had a deckhand get a real nasty bruise/contusion on his forearm. He was checking (stopping) 6 barges down in the lock with a 2" line (rope)... The line snapped and it barely "bit" him on the forearm. No bones were broken, but the bruise swelled up so bad that they had to open is whole arm from his thumb to his mid biceps w/an incision. I think they said 300+ stitches in the end. The pictures were disgusting, his whole arm lay there opened up to heal! Just imagine if they couldn't relieve that pressure from the damage! A 2" diameter/lock line when snapped will actually knock one right out of their safety shoes... I always position myself accordingly when grabbing lines. When the lines go, they sound real nasty right before and then it goes dead silent and then bam... Like 10 12 gauge shotguns going off! You figure that line may be checking sometimes almost 10,000 tons of weight down! Nothing to take too lightly. I always drop or raise the lock chamber slowly... We used to have one dickhead that would try and snap the lines by throwing too much water around! You would see bits and parts of the ropes laying on the lock wall! :-O

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