PTS Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 I think in this case the gift basket people definitely come off looking cheap and that it was something thrown together at the last minute. However, in no way was it appropriate for the newlyweds to basically "call them out on it". Both at fault and the givers probably should have skipped the reception and sent the basket. Totally agree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 It was disappointing/confusing in that if we're not all playing by the same rule book, why play at all. Guilt from "well, we were very grateful they traveled to be with us in the first place." I do believe being present is the best present (long, self-satisfied Carollaesque sniff). But c'mon. You open the gifts. You receive them. And some make you go "hmm." We got a used blender from an old relative from my wife. We smiled, were grateful, looked at each other and said "Daiquiris!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Big Cat Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 We got a used blender from an old relative from my wife. We smiled, were grateful, looked at each other and said "Daiquiris!!!" Ha, well, I guess you and your wife are just better than us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Jim, I am with you, my ex and i did a JoP wedding then later in the summer we had a big cook-out party at my parents house...we asked for no gifts, we just wanted to have a party...granted not the same as a formal wedding situation, but we made the decision not to go that route because we wanted a 'non-pressure' celebration of us and those around us. And who ever said you got an invitation, not an admission ticket...very well put We got a used blender from an old relative from my wife. We smiled, were grateful, looked at each other and said "Daiquiris!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BringBackFergy Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Exactly. Let alone a lesbian marriage as in this case. Double whammy when there is no groom to temper the bride. "Gee honey, maybe you should let this go and not text them for the receipt." As in my earlier link, probably why the divorce rates skyrocket with same sex female marriages... I think a 14" Dildo with the name "King Dong" emblazoned on the box would be appropriate for this "happy" couple.....otherwise "candlesticks are always nice." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Big Cat Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 I think a 14" Dildo with the name "King Dong" emblazoned on the box would be appropriate for this "happy" couple.....otherwise "candlesticks are always nice." Too rigid...I'm told. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Ha, well, I guess you and your wife are just better than us. Well that just goes without saying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BringBackFergy Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Too rigid...I'm told. King Dong ??...or the candlesticks?? Funny thing is my wife and I got a pair of candlesticks for our wedding and they were in a funky blue glass style....if a cop ever searches my house they will confiscate them as bongs...spot on match. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GOBILLS78 Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 I had people at my wedding who gave nothing, and that is fine. If you're doing the inviting, there's a reasonable expectation that this isn't going to be a money-making venture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 I had people at my wedding who gave nothing, and that is fine. If you're doing the inviting, there's a reasonable expectation that this isn't going to be a money-making venture. I will say this though the money we did get really helped. We were young (I had just turned 22) and were moving across the country to a job I had in CA. We still have the gift list. I'll look it up when I get home. Should be interesting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Big Cat Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 I will say this though the money we did get really helped. We were young (I had just turned 22) and were moving across the country to a job I had in CA. We still have the gift list. I'll look it up when I get home. Should be interesting. Do you recall how much you and your wife spent on the wedding itself? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Do you recall how much you and your wife spent on the wedding itself? Zero. That's what parents are for. Do parents no longer pay for weddings? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plenzmd1 Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Not to jump on Jim's bandwagon, but we were mid thirties, paid for the wedding ourselves, (about 10k,) asked people to donate to one of two charities instead of bring gifts. We had all the chit we needed living in a 900 sq ft condo , wasn't much room for anything else anyways LOL. We did get some very personal , homemade gifts...cost nothing to the folks who gave them to us except time and effort and love , and we still proudly display these gifts to this day 16 years later. Gifts at weddings for older folks is just crude to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cugalabanza Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Jim, I am with you, my ex and i did a JoP wedding then later in the summer we had a big cook-out party at my parents house...we asked for no gifts, we just wanted to have a party...granted not the same as a formal wedding situation, but we made the decision not to go that route because we wanted a 'non-pressure' celebration of us and those around us. And who ever said you got an invitation, not an admission ticket...very well put I think that's a pretty cool way of doing it. I wish more people went this route. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BringBackFergy Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Not to jump on Jim's bandwagon, but we were mid thirties, paid for the wedding ourselves, (about 10k,) asked people to donate to one of two charities instead of bring gifts. We had all the chit we needed living in a 900 sq ft condo , wasn't much room for anything else anyways LOL. We did get some very personal , homemade gifts...cost nothing to the folks who gave them to us except time and effort and love , and we still proudly display these gifts to this day 16 years later. Gifts at weddings for older folks is just crude to me. Why does this response of yours make me feel like a shallow SOB for enjoying/appreciating the cash and gifts we received at our wedding?? Way to bring me down...did you marry Martha Stewart by chance?? j/k Very nice gesture on your part. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jauronimo Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Zero. That's what parents are for. Do parents no longer pay for weddings? Not always in this country. Which is why I'm going to get married in India. Not only will the bride's family pay far out the ass, but her family will give my family many goats. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BringBackFergy Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 Not always in this country. Which is why I'm going to get married in India. Not only will the bride's family pay far out the ass, but her family will give my family many goats. Is that like a lifetime supply of mutton?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 I would tend to agree with him but I'm biased since I'm already his "lap dog". But when my wife and I got married we basically sent an announcement that we were getting married at Lake Tahoe and gave the day and time. We put in the announcement/invite that we would love to see you there but if you couldn't afford it then we understood because we couldn't afford to pay for a big wedding. A lot of people still showed, and we had an excellent time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 there is ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong with enjoying gifts of money and expensive gifts, the whole point of this discussion is how each gift should be welcomed because who knows what is going on behind the other person's front door...some are able and willing to indulge, some (raises hand) still sometimes have trouble scraping a couple extra bucks together, but still want to enjoy in our family/friends special day. Its where these alleged expectations come into the mix..I'd rather get a nicely done scrapbook of pictures and memories, that'll last alot longer than any amount of money... Why does this response of yours make me feel like a shallow SOB for enjoying/appreciating the cash and gifts we received at our wedding?? Way to bring me down...did you marry Martha Stewart by chance?? j/k Very nice gesture on your part. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 (edited) Not always in this country. Which is why I'm going to get married in India. Not only will the bride's family pay far out the ass, but her family will give my family many goats. And the best part? No dating. "Here's our daughter, she's yours." I work with an Indian guy, not the best looking guy and the least fun by far. (You know I don't drink Jim? Yes_______, I know you don't drink ) His arranged marriage wife is smoking hot!! We were at a wedding a number of years ago and my wife said "look at what __________ is wearing.....emeralds!" A huge necklace with matching earings and braclet. $$$ Edited June 24, 2013 by Chef Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts