Breaking News: It's actually Meazza's fault

[OCinBuffalo]

(Apologies for lateness) We have breaking news from the White House:

 

None of this is President Obama's fault, still. Meazza is guilty of terrible crimes, which I will detail here. Meazza is the problem, and if anybody defends Meazza, then that just proves what you can buy with Meazza's Canadian equivalent of fat cat Koch brothers loonies and toonies. If Meazza defends himself, then that proves his status as a detestable fool, who is also an incredibly skilled liar, as my rundown of typical Meazza distortions and lies will prove:

 

1. Obama wouldn't be stuck defending Israel, and we'd already have an agreement, if it wasn't for foreigners like Meazza derailing the process all the time. Perhaps the single biggest liar on the Israel/Palestine question, he constantly applies what he calls logic to this situation, but we all know he's only doing it because the Jews are paying him in Jew gold. On several occasions perfectly reasonable arguments have been put to Meazza regarding the Zionists and their internet meme activity, and every single time he has shot them down. There was nothing wrong with the arguments, what's wrong is: Meazza. How in the hell is Obama supposed to provide leadership, with this foreign menace from the north constantly spreading his lies and sedition?

 

2. Speaking of Canada, Meazza is on record as a Quebec basher. His racist comments prove one thing: he wants Obama to fail. He said French Canadians want "misery for all". He actually said that! Where have we heard that before? That's right: the TEA party. They say the same thing about Obama, for the same reason. Racism! Guilt by association be damned, this is guilt by correlation! And yes, I know what a correlation is, I've spent 3 years in sociology, which makes the rest of you ignorant of statistics. I also have a minor in Women's studies, so don't talk to me about correlation.

 

3. The insidiousness that is Meazza is as rampant as it is pervasive. And here's another example: Meazza sends PMs to everybody. Why? What's in the PMs that can't be exposed to the public? What is Meazza hiding? What are his crimes? How is Obama supposed to run a government, when we have Meazzas sending private communications to: other people? We need to "Stop the Leaks"(now bolded, per Pasta Joe douchebaggery), immediately. We can't have Meazza talking to anybody in private, ever, because if we do, this foreigner might pose a threat to Obama, which poses a threat to national security. Is Obama not the POTUS, morons? Then what? We can't go after people who are leaking bad things about him? All we are saying is that we need something like a moderator to ensure that nobody says anything bad about Obama while he's the President, and endangers national security as a result. That's all.

 

4. And, it's not like Meazza doesn't have a record of making other people take the blame. He has openly stated that he blames fatigue, Carey Price, and Republicans in Congress, for his idiocy. How is Obama supposed to escape that ridiculously wide ranging net? I have news Meazza, the poor are sick and tired of being sick and tired, and you fat cats are to blame, not Obama. Blaming a perfectly good NHL goalie? That's just irrational. I can understand blaming the Republicans in Congress, but again, what do they have to do with Meazza's many failures? So, of course Meazza's going to blame Obama for being an idiot, because that is the best way to deflect our attention from him being an idiot.

 

These crimes against decent people are undeniable. No wonders Obama can't get anything done with people like Meazza around.

 

And the latest? Meazza has said he likes spaghetti. But I've heard it as: "he likes little boys, that play soccer". Of course Meazza will deny it. When he was confronted with a list of serious, unforgivable charges against him, he only denied being a monster, and said nothing about the rest.

 

People like Meazza prove why the Constitution is an outdated document, and we should just keep the parts we like and drop the parts we don't. Clearly his hate speech, and his distortions, stand in the way of creating a more democratic society.

 

How can anyone blame President Obama, with people like Meazza around?

 

 

Update: A correction to our last article. It turns out none of this is Magox's fault. Our mistake. I mean, it's not like I we had any malicious intent towards Magox or anything, we were just printing what was known at the time, so you can't sue us.

Edited May 22, 2013 by OCinBuffalo

[meazza]

I am outraged about all of the above and believe me heads will roll for this.

[3rdnlng]

(Apologies for lateness) We have breaking news from the White House:

 

None of this is President Obama's fault, still. Meazza is guilty of terrible crimes, which I will detail here. Meazza is the problem, and if anybody defends Meazza, then that just proves what you can buy with Meazza's Canadian equivalent of fat cat Koch brothers loonies and toonies. If Meazza defends himself, then that proves his status as a detestable fool, who is also an incredibly skilled liar, as my rundown of typical Meazza distortions and lies will prove:

 

1. Obama wouldn't be stuck defending Israel, and we'd already have an agreement, if it wasn't for foreigners like Meazza derailing the process all the time. Perhaps the single biggest liar on the Israel/Palestine question, he constantly applies what he calls logic to this situation, but we all know he's only doing it because the Jews are paying him in Jew gold. On several occasions perfectly reasonable arguments have been put to Meazza regarding the Zionists and their internet meme activity, and every single time he has shot them down. There was nothing wrong with the arguments, what's wrong is: Meazza. How in the hell is Obama supposed to provide leadership, with this foreign menace from the north constantly spreading his lies and sedition?

 

2. Speaking of Canada, Meazza is on record as a Quebec basher. His racist comments prove one thing: he wants Obama to fail. He said French Canadians want "misery for all". He actually said that! Where have we heard that before? That's right: the TEA party. They say the same thing, for the same reason. Racism! Guilt by association be damned, this is guilt by correlation! And yes, I know what a correlation is, I've spent 3 years in sociology, which makes the rest of you ignorant of statistics. I also have a minor in Women's studies, so don't talk to me about correlation.

 

3. The insidiousness that is Meazza is as rampant as it is pervasive. And here's another example: Meazza sends PMs to everybody. Why? What's in the PMs that can't be exposed to the public? What is Meazza hiding? What are his crimes? How is Obama supposed to run a government, when we have Meazza's sending private communications to: other people? We need to "Stop the Leaks", immediately. We can't have Meazza talking to anybody in private, ever, because if we do, this foreigner might pose a threat to Obama, which poses a threat to national security. Is Obama not the POTUS, morons? Then what? We can't go after people who are leaking bad things about him? All we are saying is that we need something like a moderator to ensure that nobody says anything bad about Obama while he's the President, and endangers national security as a result. That's all.

 

4. And, it's not like Meazza doesn't have a record of making other people take the blame. He has openly stated that he blames fatigue, Carey Price, and Republicans in Congress, for his idiocy. How is Obama supposed to escape that ridiculously wide ranging net? I have news Meazza, the poor are sick and tired of being sick and tired, and you fat cats are to blame, not Obama. Blaming a perfectly good NHL goalie? That's just irrational. I can understand blaming the Republicans in Congress, but again, what do they have to do with Meazza's many failures? So, of course Meazza's going to blame Obama for being an idiot, because that is the best way to deflect our attention from him being an idiot.

 

These crimes against decent people are undeniable. No wonders Obama can't get anything done with people like Meazza around.

 

And the latest? Meazza has said he likes spaghetti. But I've heard it as: "he likes little boys, that play soccer". Of course Meazza will deny it. When he was confronted with a list of serious, unforgivable charges against him, he only denied being a monster, and said nothing about the rest.

 

People like Meazza prove why the Constitution is an outdated document, and we should just keep the parts we like and drop the parts we don't. Clearly his hate speech, and his distortions, stand in the way of creating a more democratic society.

 

How can anyone blame President Obama, with people like Meazza around?

 

 

Update: A correction to our last article. It turns out none of this is Magox's fault. Our mistake. I mean, it's not like I we had any malicious intent towards Magox or anything, we were just printing what was known at the time, so you can't sue us.

 

Congrats. You got your 4:00am post in by midnight. JW would be proud.