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Posted

Once an addict, always an addict. That's why repeatedly tell my sons that taking any addictive drugs may lead to their death.

 

hope you include alcohol and tobacco

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Posted

hope you include alcohol and tobacco

I do. Smoking is right out. As for alcohol, I tell them that while legal and socially acceptable, it can lead to alcoholism, so if they feel they must drink, moderation is the key.

Posted (edited)

i feel so bad for andy reid obviously. he takes a beating down here from both the fans and some of the press. i really cannot imagine the pain he is going thru. if there is anything positive that could be garnered from this is maybe they(press and fans) will lighten up on reid. i realize sports are fun and games, being an NFL coach is hard enough, balancing all the substance abuse problems of the sons, the legal stuff, wow! lots on one's shoulders.

Edited by dwight in philly
Posted

My thoughts and prayers go out to his family. It sounds like his son was particularly troubled. May he rest in peace and his family find some modicum of same.

Posted (edited)

Sad, Andy comes across as such a solid guy. Call me insensitive but I think he deserved better than his sons past "dealings"

Has a CoD been established ?

Edited by Joe_the_6_pack
Posted

Sad, Andy comes across as such a solid guy. Call me insensitive but I think he deserved better than his sons past "dealings"

Has a CoD been established ?

 

It's tough. No one deserves what he must be going through but any guess on what his home life was like or what kind of stuff the Reid family dealt with behind closed doors is, just a guess.

 

The dynamic of how these guys can manage success in the nfl coaching ranks and a solid home life just seems at times like it can't be a healthy balance.

 

In 8 months we've had one nfl head coach hit divorce and two lose sons (if you count philbin who was on the verge of HC)... Hopefully the coaching fraternity figures out something to help balance the stresses of the jobs and the needs of the families.

Posted

That's true im making some assumptions (and don't forget dungees kid too), but at end of day I think it's about individual responsibilty. Plenty of kids with demonstrably horrible upbringings don't do things like this.

Posted

That's true im making some assumptions (and don't forget dungees kid too), but at end of day I think it's about individual responsibilty. Plenty of kids with demonstrably horrible upbringings don't do things like this.

For sure. Not excusing anything his son chose- especially if we find the death to be related to his past bad decisions. In the end, you make your own choices.

 

The psychology of a coaches family has always been a curiosity of mine though. How you can have a wife and kids and still do the Jon gruden 18 hour grind. It's not totally unique to coaching but it stands out to me that of the small pool of 32 men with the job title - 2 current ones have buried sons in 2012 and 1 is divorcing. That's limiting the pool to active head coaches in the 2012 calendar year. That's just the stuff that was big enough to make the news, and I couldn't even tell you what percentage have a wife and kids at home to begin with. kind of thinking out loud as who knows what would've happened if Reid sold cars instead. Can't blame the job title but I hope it's not a situation where success at home and at work are in opposition.

Posted

I'm so sorry for Coach Andy. He's been a good coach for quite some time, and but moreso a decent person from all accounts. No dad should ever have to bury his son.

 

I know we'll say prayers for his family. I hope he takes some time to grieve. He's earned it and has a good coaching staff that can handle training camp for a week or so.

 

RIP.

Posted

For sure. Not excusing anything his son chose- especially if we find the death to be related to his past bad decisions. In the end, you make your own choices.

 

The psychology of a coaches family has always been a curiosity of mine though. How you can have a wife and kids and still do the Jon gruden 18 hour grind. It's not totally unique to coaching but it stands out to me that of the small pool of 32 men with the job title - 2 current ones have buried sons in 2012 and 1 is divorcing. That's limiting the pool to active head coaches in the 2012 calendar year. That's just the stuff that was big enough to make the news, and I couldn't even tell you what percentage have a wife and kids at home to begin with. kind of thinking out loud as who knows what would've happened if Reid sold cars instead. Can't blame the job title but I hope it's not a situation where success at home and at work are in opposition.

 

But compare that to the entire population. What is the divorce rate in this country? Also, unfortunately, lots of kids die early. It's like an athlete commits a crime and everyone acts like all athletes are terrible people when they are far away the minority of representing all athletes.

 

That said, I've been lucky to play sports throughout my life and into college. However, I have zero interest in coaching because it simply requires so much extra time. But given how many coaches there are in the world, a terrible tragedy like this is very rare. RIP to the Reid family. Drugs don't discriminate.

Posted

But compare that to the entire population. What is the divorce rate in this country? Also, unfortunately, lots of kids die early. It's like an athlete commits a crime and everyone acts like all athletes are terrible people when they are far away the minority of representing all athletes.

 

That said, I've been lucky to play sports throughout my life and into college. However, I have zero interest in coaching because it simply requires so much extra time. But given how many coaches there are in the world, a terrible tragedy like this is very rare. RIP to the Reid family. Drugs don't discriminate.

 

Given coaching on a broad level, yes it's probably not a major issue- at some levels it's very likely hugely positive for a relationship with kids.

 

At the nfl head coach level though, it's a whole different beast. This is obviously not an average year by any means but having a father or husband that's at the office 18 hours a day must be hard for any family. Being in a high stress pressure cooker where dad/husband is answering to press and rabid fan bases.... Coupled with moving cities a lot.... Unless your a family that's into football together - like the ryans, schotenheimer, Gregg Williams etc.... It's got to be really tough on everyone around. Even then it's got to be far harder than average to successfully balance.

Posted

involvement with drugs never ends well..too sad

 

so true. even temporary involvement with them leads to regret

and some permanent issues--as some of us may know..

 

prayers for the Reid family.

Posted

I feel terrible for Andy. I'm sure he did all he could to get his boys straightened out. Awful thing for a dad to have to go through.

Posted

Agreed, very sad. One of the hard things Coach Andy will have to come to grips with, is the workaholic hours football coaches must put in to achieve success, especially when establishing themselves.

Those hours necessarily come at the expense of time with family. Of course, young people across the country are lavished with family attention and still get into trouble and other young people across the country are neglected and turn out well.

 

Hopefully this will turn out to be a medical condition unrelated to his past drug use, not because any cause of death is good but it would lessen any burden of guilt his family might feel.

In the end do those extra hours help? The losing teams put in the same amount of time as the winning teams. The only thing that matters in the NFL is the QB position. Did it help Andy Reid's relationship with his son to spend countless hours at the practice facility only to have his QB be unable to run the two minute offense and puke on the field during the SuperBowl?

I have two sons and it pains me not to see them when I come home late from work. And even if Reid had been a stay at home dad his son may still have succomb to drug addiction. But I ask again are 100 hour work weeks really necessary only to have Lee Evans drop the AFC championship winning TD pass or for Norwood to miss wide right?

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