DC Tom Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 So Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Hey, fella, why the long face?"
basskik11 Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 I missed the presser any transcripts up? I don't think it's happened yet. lol...
JÂy RÛßeÒ Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 Patient: Well Doc, what's the prognosis? Doc: Terminal cancer - you have 2 weeks to live. Patient: I'm going to have to get a second opinion. Doc: OK - you're ugly too.
Beerball Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 Does no presser mean 2 hours of bad jokes? A pony walks into a bar and says "Bartender, may I have a drink?" Bartender says "What? I can't hear you. speak up!" "May I please have a drink?" "What? You have to speak up!" "Could I please have a drink?" "Now listen, if you don't speak up I will not serve you." "I'm sorry, I'm just a little hoarse."
The Wiz Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 I missed the presser any transcripts up? We'll put it up when the presser happens.
Mark Long Beach Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 lunacy. I want proof of a signed contract. I want to see Mario up front saying how grateful he is to be a Buffalo Bill.
Shouldaplayedflutie99 Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 He couldnt really pull out now could he?!...the man likes to make people wait..I hope he gets to games on time this season ...
JÂy RÛßeÒ Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 The marriage counselor suggested going out one night a week for a nice dinner, maybe a bottle of wine, to save our marriage. My wife goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
NickelCity Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 Grrrrrrrr. Collective Bills paranoia kicking in.
DC Tom Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 So a guy walks into a bar and says "ground up and in the freezer." Bartender says "You're the tenth guy to say that in the past half hour."
Mark Long Beach Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 can we update the thread title letting people know that press conference hasn't happened yet?
QCity Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 A man walks into his bedroom with a duck under his arm and says "This is the pig I been f***ing" His wife says "That's not a pig that's a duck" He replies "I wasn't talking to you"
PromoTheRobot Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 How do you keep a moron in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow. The Bills call a press conference. Fixed. PTR
Kelly the Dog Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 Tim Tebow walks into a hotel and throws three big nails on the counter and says, "Hey, can anyone put me up for the night?"
Beerball Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "He called again!"
DC Tom Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 A blonde is walking alongside a river. She looks across the river, and sees another blonde. She shouts across "Hey, how'd you get to the other side of the river?" The second blonde replies "What do you mean? YOU'RE on the other side of the river!"
Beerball Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 A blonde goes into a Best Buy. She asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing and again the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes. Fustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk, "How do you know I am a blonde?" The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV - it's a microwave."
Billsrhody Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 (edited) A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are in a race... who comes in last? The bills press conference Edited March 15, 2012 by Billsrhody
John Cocktosten Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 A man walking down the street sees a sign on a door that says, "Sandwiches $1. Handjobs $2". He walks in and looks at the woman behind the counter and says, "Are you the one giving the handjobs?" The lady replies, "yep!" He says,"Well can you wash your hands and make me a sandwich?"
FitzShowUsYourTitz Posted March 15, 2012 Posted March 15, 2012 NFL Live starting right now on ESPN2. Good distraction.
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