Just Jack Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Star Trek- Reasons Why Kirk is Better than Picard Shirt 1. Kirk collects antique guns. Picard collects antique matrioshka nesting dolls. 2. Picard is from France. 3. Picard once wore formal Klingon robes for a Klingon ceremony. If Kirk ever wore Klingon robes it would be because he took them off a dead Klingon. 4. Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulphur, potassium nitrate, charcoal and then fired diamonds into the hearts of his enemies. (Need we say more?) 5. Kirk once said: Youre the Captains woman till he says your not. 6. Picards engineer wears goofy wrap-around sunglasses. Kirks engineer wears a kilt and can drink you under the table. 7. Kirk fought the Greek god Apollo. And won. 8. Kirk would have slept with Beverly Crusher by episode two. 9. Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon -- easily. 10. Picard grew up on a quaint little French vineyard, squishing grapes with his toes, while Kirk slung bails of wheat and hay in Iowa to put himself through school. 12. Kirk once said: "I've got a belly-ache -- and it's a beauty. 13. Kirk ate little colored cubes and still remained relatively healthy. 14. Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology. 15. Picard hasn't fathered any children; Kirk -- probably millions.
/dev/null Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Star Trek- Reasons Why Kirk is Better than Picard Shirt 1. Kirk collects antique guns. Picard collects antique matrioshka nesting dolls. 2. Picard is from France. 3. Picard once wore formal Klingon robes for a Klingon ceremony. If Kirk ever wore Klingon robes it would be because he took them off a dead Klingon. 4. Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulphur, potassium nitrate, charcoal and then fired diamonds into the hearts of his enemies. (Need we say more?) 5. Kirk once said: “You’re the Captain’s woman till he says your not.” 6. Picard’s engineer wears goofy wrap-around sunglasses. Kirk’s engineer wears a kilt and can drink you under the table. 7. Kirk fought the Greek god Apollo. And won. 8. Kirk would have slept with Beverly Crusher by episode two. 9. Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon -- easily. 10. Picard grew up on a quaint little French vineyard, squishing grapes with his toes, while Kirk slung bails of wheat and hay in Iowa to put himself through school. 12. Kirk once said: "I've got a belly-ache -- and it's a beauty.” 13. Kirk ate little colored cubes and still remained relatively healthy. 14. Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology. 15. Picard hasn't fathered any children; Kirk -- probably millions. Without having to Google it for answers to copy/paste... Picard has never been demoted Picard doesn't let Klingons run amok on his ship with medieval weapons Picard travels back in time to save humanity from The Borg. Kirk travels back in time to save the freakin whales Klingons fight Kirk. Klingons fight for Picard The good news is you got orders to the flagship USS Enterprise. The bad news is you wear a red shirt. Which Captain do you want leading you into battle?
DC Tom Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Without having to Google it for answers to copy/paste... Picard has never been demoted Picard doesn't let Klingons run amok on his ship with medieval weapons Picard travels back in time to save humanity from The Borg. Kirk travels back in time to save the freakin whales Klingons fight Kirk. Klingons fight for Picard The good news is you got orders to the flagship USS Enterprise. The bad news is you wear a red shirt. Which Captain do you want leading you into battle? Picard's dress uniform is...a dress. Picard has a therapist sitting next to him on the bridge. Picard never hit anyone with a flying double-footed kick to the chest. Picard got captured and assimilated by the Borg...Kirk destroyed Landru, V'Ger, Va'al, Nomad, the doomsday machine, Jack the Ripper, and defeated both the Nazis and Genghis Khan.
/dev/null Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Picard's dress uniform is...a dress. Picard doesn't set Starfleet dress code. That's something that has evolved over time. You know, like from the last century Picard has a therapist sitting next to him on the bridge. So you don't want to have Counselor Troi sitting next to you? Picard never hit anyone with a flying double-footed kick to the chest. That's what subordinates are for. Dudes the Captain, he has more important things to worry about Picard got captured and assimilated by the Borg...Kirk destroyed Landru, V'Ger, Va'al, Nomad, the doomsday machine, Jack the Ripper, and defeated both the Nazis and Genghis Khan. Picard prevented Q from stopping humanity from ever existing. If humanity had never existed, Jack the Ripper, the Nazis, Gengish Khan, etc would never have existed either
Pilsner Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Q never would have messed with Kirk. Your banter is hilarious tho.
/dev/null Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Q never would have messed with Kirk. Very true. The Q seek a worthy adversary. Kirk is like swatting flies. Picard presents more of a challenge
Pilsner Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 (edited) Everyone is part nerd. It's just a matter of what degree of nerdiness u r willing to admit to. Edited June 12, 2011 by Pilsner
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Kirk has a girl on every planet. Picard had to be forced kicking and screaming into sleeping with that archaeologist broad.
Beerball Posted June 12, 2011 Author Posted June 12, 2011 Kirk has a girl on every planet. Picard had to be forced kicking and screaming into sleeping with that archaeologist broad. game/set/match
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 (edited) game/set/match Awesome Edited June 12, 2011 by joesixpack
DC Tom Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Picard doesn't set Starfleet dress code. That's something that has evolved over time. You know, like from the last century Everyone else wore pants. Picard wore a dress. So you don't want to have Counselor Troi sitting next to you? Kirk didn't need eye candy (in as much as Troi was) sitting next to him. He had it waiting for him in his quarters. Picard had...goldfish. Picard prevented Q from stopping humanity from ever existing. If humanity had never existed, Jack the Ripper, the Nazis, Gengish Khan, etc would never have existed either Conveniently forgetting that Q wasn't stopping humanity from ever existing...Q was testing Picard, sending him on some kitty-ass voyage of self discovery. Kirk never went on a voyage of self-discovery. Kirk went on voyages of winning.
UConn James Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Everyone else wore pants. Picard wore a dress. Kirk didn't need eye candy (in as much as Troi was) sitting next to him. He had it waiting for him in his quarters. Picard had...goldfish. Conveniently forgetting that Q wasn't stopping humanity from ever existing...Q was testing Picard, sending him on some kitty-ass voyage of self discovery. Kirk never went on a voyage of self-discovery. Kirk went on voyages of winning. Tom, you've officially reclaimed the title. Swearing in is at noon tomorrow, where your possessions will be moved into the residence while you deliver your re-inaugural address and you'll be given a new set of launch codes.
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Kirk never went on a voyage of self-discovery. Kirk went on voyages of winning. Win. Weaving Kirk v. Piicard with Sheen is just plain win.
DC Tom Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Tom, you've officially reclaimed the title. Swearing in is at noon tomorrow, where your possessions will be moved into the residence while you deliver your re-inaugural address and you'll be given a new set of launch codes. I knew it wouldn't be long...
Pilsner Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Allow me to be the first in line to pay tribute to the redeemed king. Congrats DC Tom.
UConn James Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Allow me to be the first in line to pay tribute to the redeemed king. Congrats DC Tom. I'm pondering what to do for a transition/lame-duck avatar before the official ceremony.
Pilsner Posted June 12, 2011 Posted June 12, 2011 (edited) With little time to think about it I would recommend an avatar pic of Karl Donitz. His supreme reign was short lived. Edited June 12, 2011 by Pilsner
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