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If someone on this board had written Hamlet, Lord of the Rings, or 1984 you'd still jump all over their **** for it

 

Let me conjure Tom's replies....

 

Hamlet: If he'd formed a workable strategy, he'd be King of Denmark and be banging Ophelia. Instead, he couldn't make a decision and stick with it, so the idiot took a dirt nap.

 

Lord of the Rings: Not more f---ing elves!

 

1984: I once knew a guy named Winston Smith. He was a dumbass. But at least he could afford razor blades.

Edited by UConn James
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Let me conjure Tom's replies....

 

Hamlet: If he'd formed a workable strategy, he'd be King of Denmark and be banging Ophelia. Instead, he couldn't make a decision and stick with it, so the idiot took a dirt nap.

 

Lord of the Rings: Not more f---ing elves!

 

1984: I once knew a guy named Winston Smith. He was a dumbass. But at least he could afford razor blades.

 

Pretty damn close on Hamlet. 1984, I could do better (maybe start with Room 101...why "101"? What the !@#$ is that all about? Seems pretty arbitrary to me.)

 

Lord of the Rings...hell, I'll criticize that right now. ****ty series written by some guy who had to invent his own language so he and his D&D crowd could feel all special about it. !@#$ing retarded. The only thing The Fellowship of the Ring has going for it is that it's not the frickin Silmarillion. Lord of the Rings makes Harry Harrison's West of Eden seem snappy, well-paced, and downright believable in comparison - and West of Eden features dinosaur rape, for Christ's sake. :wallbash:

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Pretty damn close on Hamlet. 1984, I could do better (maybe start with Room 101...why "101"? What the !@#$ is that all about? Seems pretty arbitrary to me.)

 

Lord of the Rings...hell, I'll criticize that right now. ****ty series written by some guy who had to invent his own language so he and his D&D crowd could feel all special about it. !@#$ing retarded. The only thing The Fellowship of the Ring has going for it is that it's not the frickin Silmarillion. Lord of the Rings makes Harry Harrison's West of Eden seem snappy, well-paced, and downright believable in comparison - and West of Eden features dinosaur rape, for Christ's sake. :wallbash:

 

But was the dinosaur a Muslim?

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