Chef Jim Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 Counter fiberglass bodied car bombs. 30 million a year for R&D, plus three interns.B52 launched AGM-129, W80 mod one...on the way... Can I wear a really neat uniform with lots of big medals? 142568[/snapback] No you can't, that would cause (at least with the males here) medal envy. You may have lots of medals, but no BIG ones. Ok? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 Looky here... The board illuminati speaks! Everybody listens... Wait wasn't that E.F. Hutton? Guys, there is enough energy in this thread to power a 25 watt light bulb!... Just think, does that include Tom's and BiB's combined 22.5 watts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PastaJoe Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 Former New York Police Commissioner Bernard Kerik is the likely choice to head the federal Homeland Security Department during President George W. Bush's second term, according to sources close to Homeland Security officials. Kerik would replace Tom Ridge, the first head of the department, who on Tuesday announced his intention to resign once a successor is in place. Kerik, 49, served as police commissioner for 16 months during 2000 and 2001 and gained national prominence during the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks. He previously was city corrections commissioner. After leaving the police post, he undertook a mission for the Bush administration to help train Iraqi police. He earned his spurs as a Bush political loyalist by delivering a prime-time speech praising the president during the Republican convention and campaigning for him in the fall. Speculation about a move to Washington increased recently when Kerik sold $5-million worth of stock in Taser, the stun-gun manufacturer. The White House declined to comment on the appointment last night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BiB_ Posted December 2, 2004 Author Share Posted December 2, 2004 Former New York Police Commissioner Bernard Kerik is the likely choice to head the federal Homeland Security Department during President George W. Bush's second term, according to sources close to Homeland Security officials. Kerik would replace Tom Ridge, the first head of the department, who on Tuesday announced his intention to resign once a successor is in place. Kerik, 49, served as police commissioner for 16 months during 2000 and 2001 and gained national prominence during the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks. He previously was city corrections commissioner. After leaving the police post, he undertook a mission for the Bush administration to help train Iraqi police. He earned his spurs as a Bush political loyalist by delivering a prime-time speech praising the president during the Republican convention and campaigning for him in the fall. Speculation about a move to Washington increased recently when Kerik sold $5-million worth of stock in Taser, the stun-gun manufacturer. The White House declined to comment on the appointment last night. 142678[/snapback] That's what I'm hearing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevbeau Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 Counter fiberglass bodied car bombs. 30 million a year for R&D, plus three interns.B52 launched AGM-129, W80 mod one...on the way... Can I wear a really neat uniform with lots of big medals? 142568[/snapback] Sure, design 'em yourself, or even the uniform...just like Patton. May I also suggest we bring back really big bicorne hats. Something that twould make Napoleon or Lord Nelson proud. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
/dev/null Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 i nominate myself. as proof of my abilities, here is the "Cowbell Alert Level" Low - No cowbell is necessary. Examples are SNL skits involving Christopher Walken or anything to do with the Bush Twins Guarded - General state of Cowbell Elevated - Some Cowbell is necessary to overcome some situation of suckiness. Several posts by TSW members (who are known to need more cowbell) fall into this category High - Cowbell is absolutely necessary to overcome extraordinary lameness. Examples are crappy music and pretty much anything involving John Kerry Severe - The most severe cases can only be solved by spending two years in a Viet Cong prison camp rammed up Christopher Walken's ass Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BiB_ Posted December 2, 2004 Author Share Posted December 2, 2004 i nominate myself. as proof of my abilities, here is the "Cowbell Alert Level" Low - No cowbell is necessary. Examples are SNL skits involving Christopher Walken or anything to do with the Bush Twins Guarded - General state of Cowbell Elevated - Some Cowbell is necessary to overcome some situation of suckiness. Several posts by TSW members (who are known to need more cowbell) fall into this category High - Cowbell is absolutely necessary to overcome extraordinary lameness. Examples are crappy music and pretty much anything involving John Kerry Severe - The most severe cases can only be solved by spending two years in a Viet Cong prison camp rammed up Christopher Walken's ass 143186[/snapback] It takes a little more than Cowbell...but you definitely are up for UnderSecretary of Warning and Reporting. And, Chef is in charge of making sure our food supplies remain safe. We'll start with Fois de Gras and Filet. Testing at 8 PM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BiB_ Posted December 2, 2004 Author Share Posted December 2, 2004 Sure, design 'em yourself, or even the uniform...just like Patton. May I also suggest we bring back really big bicorne hats. Something that twould make Napoleon or Lord Nelson proud. 143183[/snapback] And a really cool sword. Gotta have a sword. One that drags on the ground, well...another one anyway. Kevbeau: Southeast Regional Director. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 It takes a little more than Cowbell...but you definitely are up for UnderSecretary of Warning and Reporting. And, Chef is in charge of making sure our food supplies remain safe. We'll start with Fois de Gras and Filet. Testing at 8 PM. 143256[/snapback] I'll get right on that Foie Gras. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
/dev/null Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 I'll get right on that Foie Gras. 143298[/snapback] hey chef, don't forget you sweaty chocolate balls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BiB_ Posted December 2, 2004 Author Share Posted December 2, 2004 hey chef, don't forget you sweaty chocolate balls 143299[/snapback] That's SALTY! See, you have to have attention to detail (or at least remember what you might have said yesterday) to be in charge. What's wrong with the SE region? Best place in America. You'd be away from the flagpole in Atlanta and could get away with tons of stevejoh-whatever. Think about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 It takes a little more than Cowbell...but you definitely are up for UnderSecretary of Warning and Reporting. And, Chef is in charge of making sure our food supplies remain safe. We'll start with Fois de Gras and Filet. Testing at 8 PM. 143256[/snapback] And what the hell's my job? I'm not proud, I'll take anything. I'll be the Deputy Assistant to the Deputy Director of the Office of the Undersecretary of Things That Go "Spoink!" When You Step On Them, if that's what it takes... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BiB_ Posted December 2, 2004 Author Share Posted December 2, 2004 And what the hell's my job? I'm not proud, I'll take anything. I'll be the Deputy Assistant to the Deputy Director of the Office of the Undersecretary of Things That Go "Spoink!" When You Step On Them, if that's what it takes... 143385[/snapback] You shot your wad trying to usurp the Bunny Party. We all know what a coniving megolomaniac you are. Fugg off. (As I recall, you had me assisinated before I even got a CHANCE to rehearse my domination, er...acceptance speech) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
/dev/null Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 rehearse my domination, er...acceptance speech) 143392[/snapback] is it gonna be a dress rehearsal? if so, make sure you wash your nipple clamps and setup the sling Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_BiB_ Posted December 3, 2004 Author Share Posted December 3, 2004 is it gonna be a dress rehearsal? if so, make sure you wash your nipple clamps and setup the sling 143435[/snapback] As long as I run the show, it's just politics. Gotta lie (sorry) talk to your constiuency. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erynthered Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 (As I recall, you had me assisinated before I even got a CHANCE to rehearse my domination, er...acceptance speech) 143392[/snapback] He made me do it............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terry Tate Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 And what the hell's my job? I'm not proud, I'll take anything. I'll be the Deputy Assistant to the Deputy Director of the Office of the Undersecretary of Things That Go "Spoink!" When You Step On Them, if that's what it takes... 143385[/snapback] If you like the sound of ridiculous under-titles, Gregg Easterbrook mentioned some funny ones in one of his columns, listing favorites: "Deputy Assistant Deputy Administrator," "Deputy Deputy Assistant Secretary," "Associate Deputy Assistant Secretary" and "Chief of Staff to the Associate Assistant Secretary." There's the actual list in this article. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cåblelady Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 And what the hell's my job? I'm not proud, I'll take anything. I'll be the Deputy Assistant to the Deputy Director of the Office of the Undersecretary of Things That Go "Spoink!" When You Step On Them, if that's what it takes... 143385[/snapback] Your job is keeping Melody happy........and buying her lots of nice stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VABills Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 And what the hell's my job? I'm not proud, I'll take anything. I'll be the Deputy Assistant to the Deputy Director of the Office of the Undersecretary of Things That Go "Spoink!" When You Step On Them, if that's what it takes... 143385[/snapback] I believe your job is to lick the left nut of BF. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevbeau Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 And a really cool sword. Gotta have a sword. One that drags on the ground, well...another one anyway. Kevbeau: Southeast Regional Director. 143257[/snapback] Sweet.... I say Suh, the South shall rise again! My first step was to order a moat dug all around the Southeast, but the damn Fish & Wildlife Dept. got on my case about giving the snakehead "frankenfish" a means of migrating across the Southeast. My answer was good, they can fight it out with the alligators who will defend the moat...but the g-friend is an environmental engineer, so I lost that argurment. So I moved to plan B...now when we reach a level of high cowbell, we will activate a giant inflatable wall, of course filled with ozone friendly gases (stupid EPA). Not sure what defensive/security role this will play, but budget constraints wouldn't let us use stone, sticks, or straw. If you need me, I'll be in my office...I need to practice shouting "I didn't authorize this!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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