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Posted

:lol:

 

Selected Nursery Rhymes

of A.D. Clay

 

Hickory Dickory Dock.

My balls fell out of my jock.

I laid them to rest

On some hooker's chest

And paddled her face with my rooster.

 

Roll, roll, roll your !@#$

Gently down my prick.

Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,

Then you'll suck my dick.

 

Hey diddle diddle,

The cat and the fiddle,

The cow jumped over the moon.

That's more than my lazy wife does,

The fat, !@#$in' smelly baboon

 

Little Miss Muffet

Sat on a tuffet

A lightbulb was stuck up her ass.

It woke up the spider

Who lived deep inside her.

He said "Hey, free electric and gas."

 

Jack and Jill went up the hill

And Jack would try to hump her.

Jill said No / and Jack said So

I'll ram it in your dumper.

 

Twinkle twinkle little star,

Will she blow me in the car.

I bought her dinner, she had fun.

My balls are boiling, I'd like to come.

 

Old Mother Hubbard

Went to the cupboard

To get her old dog a snack.

The cupboard was bare,

She didn't despair.

She let Rover munch on her crack

 

Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater.

Whacked off in the movie theater.

Sprayed his load across the screen

And ruined Titanic's final scene

 

Jack and Betty, up in a tree

F-U-C-K-I-N-G

First comes Betty, then comes Jack

Then comes the goo from Betty's crack.

 

Little Boy Blue -

He needed the money.

 

Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie

Jerked off in his girlfriend's eye

When her eye was dry and shut

Georgie !@#$ed that one-eyed slut

 

Old King Cole was a merry old soul

A merry old soul was he

He chewed off his tit

And ate his own stevestojan

And washed it down with some tea.

 

Hickory Dickory Dock

Some chick was sucking my rooster

The clock struck two

I dropped my goo

I dumped the B word on the next block.

 

Jack and Jill went up the hill

Both with a buck and a quarter

Jill came down with two-fifty

That !@#$in' whore.

 

Mary, Mary, quite contrary,

Trim that kitty it's too damn hairy

 

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet

Eating her curds and whey.

Along came a spider,

Who sat down beside her

And said, "Hey, what's in the bowl, B word?"

 

Old Mother Hubbard

Went to the cupboard

To get her poor dog a bone

When she bent over,

Her Rover took over

And she got a bone of her own.

 

Jack Sprat could eat no fat

His wife could eat no lean

So Jack ignored those flabby breasts

And licked her !@#$ clean

 

Rock-a-bye baby, on the tree top

Your mother's a whore,

And I ain't your pop.

 

Little Bo Peep !@#$ed her sheep

Blew a horse, licked his feet

She ate his ass so very nice

Tongued his balls not once but twice

 

Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater

Had a wife, loved to beat her

Smacked her twice across the head

!@#$ed her ass and went to bed

 

Little jack Horner sat in a corner

Eating a pizza pie.

He stevestojan pepperoni,

Then blew his friend Tony,

And wiped his mouth on his tie

 

Twinkle, twinkle little star

How I wonder what you are

Shine upon the parking lot

As I eat my girl friends twat.

 

Three blind mice, see how they run

Where the !@#$ are they going?

 

Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe

Suck my dick and swallow slow.

 

Jack be nimble,

Jack be quick

Jack burnt off his !@#$in' dick.

 

There was an old lady

Who lived in a shoe

She had so many kids

Her uterus fell out

 

Patty cake, patty cake,

Baker's man

If your chick's on her period

!@#$ her in the can

 

Mary had a little lamb,

She kept in her backyard.

When she took her panties off

His wooly dick got hard.

 

Doe, a deer, a female deer.

Ray, the guy that !@#$ed her ass.

 

Rub a Dub Dub

Three men in a tub.

Faggots have threesomes, too-

So !@#$in' what.

 

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

I !@#$ed your mother's ass

And she had you.

Posted

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To have a little fun

Stupid Jill forgot the pill

And now they have a son.

 

Mary had a little lamb

Her father shot it dead

Now it goes to school with her

Between two hunks of bread.

Posted
Jack and Jill went up the hill

To have a little fun

Stupid Jill forgot the pill

And now they have a son.

 

123054[/snapback]

 

 

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To get a pail of water

Jack got down, Jill came around

And now they have a son and a daughter

Posted
Actually, if you want to know the full meaning of the rhyme:

 

"Ring around the rosey" - refers to the sores plague sufferrers would get, which were red before they turned black.

 

"Pocket full of posies" - refers to the habit people developed of carrying around flowers, either to 1) cleanse the air of the "bad humors" that were thought to cause plague, or 2) to mask the smell of the unburied dead.

 

"Ashes, ashes, we all fall down" - actually, I've heard the original form of this line was "Achoo, achoo, we all fall down", which is a fairly accurate six word description of bubonic plauge.

122968[/snapback]

 

Is there an echo in here?

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