
smokinandjokin
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Sort of like this one? They already screwed around once and messed it up, why do they have to do it again?
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Bar Flys- better bars that you have partied at
smokinandjokin replied to Pete's topic in Off the Wall Archives
Good times. -
I'd give her the Pirate. Never heard of the Pirate? Well, it goes like this (it's much better when you can act it out as you describe it, so you'll have to use your imaginations)...When you are getting down with a chick, right when you are about to bust a nut, you pull out and shoot it in her eye. Then, as she is appalled and about to stand up, you kick her in the shin. That way, as she's going to the bathroom, she's dragging her leg (like a peg leg) and has her hand over her eye (like a patch) and she's saying "Arrrggh!" Ha, this broad looks like she'd love the pirate.
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That's what I'm skeptical about too. I don't mind the colors so much, and anticipated a tweak from the old blue and gold. But the logo should at least in some way resemble the old crest- that thing was awesome!
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Ugh. Why do they always have to mess with a good thing? I want them back to blue and gold as much as anyone, and I'm all for updating the original uni's a bit, but they need to stay true to the old ones more than this car suggests. I am hoping this not true. The logo sucks. You've screwed me for the last time Mattel!!!
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It wasn't my goal, I don't play. I did get called into the US training camp before the World Cup started, but it would've conflicted with my softball games, so I declined. Ripping on the US for taking a goal when some sweaty greaser put it into his own net is not saying much for the Italians. Trust me, I'm not saying the Azzuri are the only team that dives. It has been pretty sad across the board during the World Cup. But they are the worst, and the embellishment of staying down and rolling around after replays show you were barely touched is pathetic. The dude Toni is 6'4" 210lbs and he falls down like he got shot in the leg. Italy, if they had their way, would win every game 1-0, stifling any creativity with their boring-ass style, scoring on a free kick that was set up by a phantom call, and then diving and rolling around wasting time until the game is over. "They have talented players, but they play like fags" said Ozzie Guillen.
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Whatever dude, you're Canadian. Don't worry, most people would try to be something else if they were Canadian, too. The greasy Italians are the biggest flop and roll fags around. They are not the only ones, not by a long shot...But they are by far the worst. Their (or should I say 'Your') goal against the US was off of a set piece for a similar rediculous dive. It seems int'l soccer has become a battle of set pieces and free kicks, and every team just takes dives to try to set them up. It is frustrating to watch, and I am a soccer fan. I can't imagine how the casual fringe fans feel watching this crap.
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Warren Buffet donates $37B...
smokinandjokin replied to Crap Throwing Monkey's topic in Off the Wall Archives
Founding Berkshire Hathaway will be his legacy, but don't overlook his contributions to American, and especially Chinese, cuisine. Where would we be without the buffet-style eating that has become so prevalent today? Where would the stoner community go in the middle of the night without $6.95 all-you-can-eat Chinese buffets? Where would homosexuals eat when they wanted a mix of breakfast and lunch at 11am? Many thanks to you, Warren Buffet, you are a true pioneer. Also, it's a little-known fact that he amassed the majority of his fortune investing in Sterno, which invented the heating solutions to keep his food warm while on the buffet table. Smart man. -
Notre Dame will certainly be in the discussion. They have to get through their first four games, and then they are smooth sailing until the final game. The first four are at Georgia Tech, home vs. Penn State and Michigan, and at Michigan State. Then its three in a row at home vs. Purdue, Stanford, and UCLA, at Navy, vs. UNC, at Air Force, and vs. Army. They finish up at USC. I can't imagine another national title contender lining up against the trifecta of Army, Navy, and Air Force in the same season. All that schedule talk is tongue-in-cheek, as my alma mater USC is not exactly lining up the world beaters. The non-conference games are Arkansas, Nebraska, and Notre Dame. The rest of the schedule is the less-than-imposing PAC-10. I can't see USC as a 'true' contender for the national title, but they will more than likely have the best talent in the conference, and should get a BCS bid. If they can beat Nebraska (in LA) and win their rivalry games against ND and UCLA, it is reasonable to think that they could be undefeated. While young QB Booty replacing Leinart will receive the most attention, things worked out pretty well when they were clueless as to who would replace Carson Palmer. The major loss is in the backfield, as I knew Bush was gone, but I thought LenDale White should've returned. Their already-weak secondary losing underclassman Darnell Bing to the NFL won't help either. The Big-12 could have an undefeated team, and like usual, it will probably be the winner of Texas-Oklahoma. Right now, Texas has many more question marks, and a tougher schedule (their biggest non-conf game is Ohio State, while OU has to win at Oregon.) Texas could be in the 'off-year' mode (~9-3) that OU (8-4) was in last year. I think we will see what Adrian Peterson is made of this year. In the SEC, I would have to lean towards Florida and LSU, but it's so hard to predict one of those teams to win a title. It's similar to the Big-10 in that you are playing 3-4 road games per year that are brutal. For Florida to go undefeated, they have to beat Tennessee, Auburn, and FSU on the road, plus beat Georgia in the Cocktail Party, and win the SEC title game. Yikes. The team I think has a VERY good chance of going undefeated is West Virginia. They are a little under the radar on a national scale, but the Big East knows who they are. A huge win in a BCS bowl game last year- beating Georgia in Atlanta in the Sugar Bowl- could propel this team to a huge 2006. It is tough to pick the national champ this year, because of the extra 5th BCS game. Who knows who could advance there. As for the eight BCS bowl teams, I will pick Notre Dame, USC, Boise State, West Virginia, Miami, Michigan, Oklahoma and LSU.
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Really could've done without this thread. Talk to your doctor if you want serious replys. All I can tell you is that I hope you took the day off of work and beat that thing into submission today.
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Tis true...However, my bringing girlfriend also increases my chances of getting some from her....but forcing her to stay sober enough to drive while I get bombed decreases my chances of getting some. Should I throw out the old, "It's okay babe, you can leave, I'll catch a ride with one of the bridesmaids" line?
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I have recently been asked by a friend from college to stand up in his wedding. I talk to this friend several times a year, and actually see him probably twice a year. I was honored he thought enough of me to ask me to take part. Then I find out that there are 13 fellahs standing in the wedding (12 + the best man.) His wife-to-be also has a maid of honor and 12 honies on her side. I think this is absurd. I have no problem sitting in the audience, and wouldn't feel slighted at all. How do the 'on-the-fence' friends feel who get invited to the wedding but are not one of the lucky 13? What is the appropriate number of groomsmen and bridesmaids in a wedding party?
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It has been widely reported that as many as 40,000 prostitutes have been imported into Germany to service fans during the World Cup. They have even built 'sex huts' to keep the fornication out of the streets and back alleys. That brings to mind two questions (I hope that's okay): 1. What percentage of American men have paid for a sex act with a prostitute? (We will say that paying a stripper for a b.j. does count as prostitution, but buying a gal dinner so she'll blow you does not.) 2. What event creates an influx of more prostitutes- the World Cup, or a U.S. political party's national convention?
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This is absolutely perfect. With that mess of a roster Isiah assembled, there's no way somebody else should have to coach that team. I'm not a big Larry Brown fan, I think the guy is extremely overrated. But I just love the fact that we can add a new chapter to the Isiah Thomas + New York Knicks story. Isiah was a horrible coach with a Finals-caliber team in Indiana. I can't wait to see what these selfish playground stiffs he brought to NYC do with him at the helm. I say 20-62 at best. Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't Isiah already trade away their 2007 1st round pick? I know the Bulls will be drafting in the Knicks #2 overall spot this year, and I think the NYK may have already dangled their top pick for next year as well.
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She can do it, this guy is proof
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In five Years - People will be making Love
smokinandjokin replied to millbank's topic in Off the Wall Archives
This was the topic of Letterman's Top 10 List last night. And it goes: -
Bar Flys- better bars that you have partied at
smokinandjokin replied to Pete's topic in Off the Wall Archives
No doubt! My bro went to SUNY Albany, I got wrecked at both of those bars many times. Lamppost had the Oasis downstairs, correct? I remember Paesan's Pizza and Sadie's for wings also. Downtown Albany has actually gotten fairly sweet over the past few years. Many new bars have opened up down there and it's not a bad time. I never went down there much when my bro was in school, we mostly hung around the college bars. -
Bar Flys- better bars that you have partied at
smokinandjokin replied to Pete's topic in Off the Wall Archives
Faherty's- Buffalo, NY Typically my Elmwood hangout, either to get things started or to finish a night off. Stiff drinks and a pool table is cool with me. Maly Koza- Prague, CZ Very chill bar with an amazing setup. Off the beaten path. Also, the underground bar in Prague that Pete referenced is incredible. Negro- Budapest, Hungary Seems rather 'commercial' and expensive compared to most of the bars we went to, but the women there were absolutely impressive. The fact that my friend and I were able to coax two of them back to our hotel may have bolstered my high opinion of this place. La Boom- Mexico City One of the best club-type places I have ever been to, and that includes the NYC scene. Very cool, relaxed lounge upstairs with balcony over looking the main bar and dancefloor. Again, many fine women. Plug Uglies- 21st & 3rd, NYC This place is an absolute dive, but I probably hung out there more than any other bar when I lived in the city. Bar shuffleboard, that's all I have to say. Cafe 216- State College, PA I spent one incredible St. Pattys Day there. Very impressed Ake's Place- Burlington VT Sports, rock'n'roll, food, drinks, and all very casual I spent five years of college in Southern California, and it didn't take long to figure out that the best bars are in the beach towns. A few fav's: OB's and Ercole's in Manhattan Beach, Cafe Bugaloo and Lighthouse (both have great live music) in Hermosa, and Naja's (on a Sunday afternoon) in Redondo. There are many, many more that I feel bad leaving out, or just can't think of right now. Anyways, I suppose I have to include the Big Tree Inn after a Bills victory and the Cobblestone after a Sabres victory! And how could I leave out Sunset Bay Beach Club and Mickey Rats? Too many good times to count at those places during the sweltering Buffalo summers. -
He basically did, saying that DWade is the best player in the league, and called him the "best teammate you could ask for." What does this mean? The cities, or the teams? Both these teams were at the very top of their respective conferences all year, and both beat the 'favorites' (Detroit and San Antonio) without home court advantage. Dallas is VERY deep, and has a bonafide star in Nowitzki, and Miami has two of the best in Wade and Shaq. These teams were more deserving than anyone else. I wanted Miami to win, but there's a twinge of sadness I feel not being able to see David Stern hand that trophy to Mark Cuban. That would've been priceless.
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Translate your name into Russian
smokinandjokin replied to smokinandjokin's topic in Off the Wall Archives
Oh come on, I wouldn't do that! While still quite gay, this is much funnier than that tranny fairy. -
Translate your name into Russian
smokinandjokin replied to smokinandjokin's topic in Off the Wall Archives
Oh trust me, they translate. -
http://www.callme.nm.ru/ Enter your name and click the button. Holy translation!!!
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My girlfriend, like 93% of all females born between 1977 and 1989, has a tatoo on her lower back (a.k.a. 'The Tramp Stamp.') I'll admit, it does give me something to look at when I'm giving her the business from behind. But what's that thing going to look like when she's 70?
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Your sister-in-law's boyfriend? I hope it's your wife's sister, and not some hootchie who married your brother and is now slutting around the PGA tour.
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Rosie O'donnell or Whoopi Goldberg?
smokinandjokin replied to Phlegm Alley's topic in Off the Wall Archives
I would have to believe that it was my Weapon of Ass Destruction that pulverized the Earth and reduced the planet to just two living women. If it were down to these two, I would probably go with Whoopi. She looks like she could be talked into doing some dirty sh*t. Rosie would probably only let you go missionary style and would lay there like a dead fish complaining the whole time. This much I know is true: Both would get the shot of love mayonaisse on the face. You don't want to risk having a kid with either one of those, especially with the world being destroyed and all. And who's holding the gun to my head? Hopefully he has a camera in his other hand because I'd love to get me and Whoopi doing it on tape!