crazyDingo

I was gonna say that. Except I was gonna write 9.Step right on back foot, Hey!

Maybe they're trying to un-do some of the bad press Jacksonville got from Bill Simmons, et al. during the Super Bowl Week: Waaaaahhh. I hafta drive ten minutes for fresh coffee. Waaahh.

"You see we're putting the cover sheet on all TPS reports now before they go out. If you could just go ahead and do that from now on that would be greeat. Mmmm 'K? Greeeat."

Trust me theres no shortage of good dining here. On the strip: Wanna great steak or maybe some 'chops? Smith & Wollensky next to MGM Grand. Great Chinese? PF Changs at Alladin. Buffet? Tons. Check out Bellagio (best resteraunts in the city) or Mirage. Italian? Too bad. For a mob town the sauces just dont rate. 5-star? Picasso at Bellagio off-strip: BBQ? Memphis BBQ on Warm Springs road (take a cab) Steaks done to perfection? Ruth Chris steak house on Paradise. Go to lasvegas.com for more. Have a great time and remember-- What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.

Sure, but the real measure would be to see how he acts if you throw a plastic cup at him. This guy may never make the NBA.

I read that. Of course, snakes and bugs are delicacies if properly prepared, too. So are all kinds of internal organs, non-perishables, and synthetics no one with common sense would eat. I guess delicacy must be some fancy word for crap. I mean carp. Nevermind.

My record of good ideas I've had in bars is pretty slim.

hmmm...lifeless, stiff, made of processed wood...I'd say if it keeps fallin over you may actually HAVE Drew Bledsoe.

Awesome. If anybody doesnt know what that comment means: they digitally replaced some cops guns with walkie-talkies when E.T. was re-released. Personally I'm hoping they digitally replace Carrie Fisher with Jessica Alba.

Dear residents of the Neverland Ranch area...

I get paid to look at this board, too. Well, I get paid WHILE I'm looking at it, anyway. HEY TOM! Just between us, I want you to tug your earlobe after every press conference as a shout-out to your homeys at Two Bills Drive.

I hereby coin the phrase "Kamikaze Carp". Anybody wishing to use this phrase is welcome to-- leave a nickel in the jar.

I was really hoping I could keep the charade going longer but you got me. Well, I guess I should take advantage of this moment to say a few things: (ahem) GET OFF MY FRICKEN BACK YOU LUNATICS!!!! thank you.

The Erie County Policy, taken from page 34 of their new employee handbook: "...specifically, employees are asked to temporarily supply their own restroom amenities including, but not limited to, toilet paper. In the event it is just not possible to supply your own amenities, please only use one square of tissue, both sides..." Wow.

Very true. He just needs to remember: Sticks and stone can break my bones, and falling on a football will sideline me 8 weeks. BTW, he felt the pass rush all the time--on top of him.

Haven't been to Angola, have you? http://sg.news.yahoo.com/050318/1/3rcp1.html

The Bengals and Browns prepare for a week? Nah. You musta been watching 6 hours to sunday.

LOL "A dingo stole my baby!" I remember that. Australia, a few years ago, right? I think that was an defense used by a murdering mom, but maybe our resident Aussie can shed some light on it...Anyway my dingo is too lazy to do any cool tricks like snatch babies.

Totally. Ya know what? LETS EMBRACE CHEMICALLY ENHANCED BASEBALL! While we're at it: Let the runners keep the bat as they round the bases and use their new 'roid rage to make rounding the bases FULL CONTACT! Let the pitcher bean one runner per inning--two, if the first is a knockout. Lets get the pharmeceutical industry involved as a sponser like they do in racing and Bonds can come out plastered with ads for Zoloft and Viagra (insert your own joke here). Bring it on! I might actually watch a game.

Thats a disaster! Being involved in that and the baseball scandal are really gonna be a black eye for 'roids. I long for the good ol' days when taking steroids used to be simpler; people did it for the love of 'roids--not for all the glamour and money it means nowadays. What are the kids supposed to do when they think, I sure want to use 'roids but I might end up like Barry Bonds? Sad day.

I dont know about you but I like what I see in this Johnson kid. He's got all the tools-- a rocket arm, two eyes, teeth. He's darn near prototypical! We should seriously think about signing him to back up Losman, if we only had 25 million to sign him based on what I saw in the QB competition! RJ=RJ

Winning bid was the same company that bought the virgin mary grilled cheese sandwich.

Would you do Martha Stewart? She's started emailing me from prison and, ya know, I got a thing for bad girls.

Going before the Federal Government to explain ethical and moral matters is like justifying to Michael Jackson your parenting methods. Congressional pukes. Baseball pukes. Hypocritical posturing and bombastic obfuscation. Anything going on anywhere else, guys? Got any kids in Iraq? MLB=RJ

I cant believe how stupid those scientists are! Dont they know that the monster always comes back to kill the mad Doctor? ALWAYS! Well, except for Young Frankenstein. I digress... See, they will find these human-brained mice plotting something and they will kill them, of course, except for one human-brained mouse who will get away injured and then kill the scientist, usually by strangulation, then the villagers will bust in and kill it. Who cant see that coming?