dib

I have a small arsenal. Finally had to buy a gun safe for them all. I wonder if a citizen in Binghamton had been carrying, all those people had to die at the hands of that gunman. O the other hand I've found that there are more places that you cant carry a weapon, than places you can. I am confident however that anyone that breaks into my house at night will be a chalk outline in the morning.

I promised my wife I wouldnt reveal her identitiy Oooops

Thats because of the scheme, no one crashes inside, they get ridden outside and end up making a natural pocket for the QB

for a DE he's older than dirt

"You're lost, he's dead, and I'm wounded."

Ah, high school football and teenage sex.

castrate the POS with a hand axe. set fire to the mother and put her out with a pitchfork

Do you guys know about things like paint grenades and claymores?

3rd option: Very Horny

Anybody notice if the guy was wearing condoms?

Liar Liar Pants on fire. Old Joke.

My son plays woods ball. Whole 9 yards of gear, even a Ghilli (?) suit.

Thats probably why you have New Zeal and Energy

why do women like old gynecologists? They have shakey fingers

Guy enters a bar and tells the bartender to give him champagne Bartender asks WHat's the occaision? Guy replies: "I just rescued a woman from the railroad tracks and had sex with her. Bartender asks: "Was she attractive?" Guy replies: "I dont know I couldnt find her head."

Oh well What's the difference between p*ssy and parsley? Nobody eats parsley Whats the difference between the cha cha and pea green pant anybody can cha cha

A guy screwed with my computer once so I beat the sh*t out of him.

What day is it today boys and girls?

I had federal jury duty once. EVERYONE is selected, you can be deferred however. Luckily I didnt have to serve on the 6 week trial.

When the opponent is in a 3rd and long situation.

depends on what you mean by "it"

hate'em back