Cugalabanza

Soccer legend / master impressionist Cristiano Ronaldo does one of his most popular impressions. "Oooh, look at me. I'm Beerball. I like to prance around like a pretty little girl," he says as the crowd roars with laughter.

The best ever was Meadowlark Lemon. None of these other jokers ever made it on Scooby Doo.

Cheers!

USA is up against it vs. Argentina tomorrow (6/21) night at 9pm on FS1. It's hard enough playing a red hot Argentina, but with three of our hardest working players (Wood, Bedoya, Jones) suspended, it becomes a real long shot. I'm hoping Klinsmann decides to go more in the direction of Pulisic and Nagbe as opposed to Beckerman & Wondolowski.

Man, Portugal can't catch a break. They still will be in to the knockout round if they can beat Hungary.

Wow, that was a nervy one and an outstanding game. USA will be without Jones, Wood & Bedoya for the semifinal.

Almost time. This is a big one. Go USA!

Might as well use the likeness of Gary Busey too. Basically indistinguishable at this point. Actually, they could just turn on a webcam inside Busey’s house, call it “The New ALF” and it would probably be a hit. GARY: Ok, boss, what’s my motivation? DIRECTOR: Well, you’re an alien being from the planet Melmac. You crash landed on planet Earth, in an upper middle class neighborhood in California. You’re stranded and confused, but you can’t help being so loveably ridiculous, so you’re accepted as a part of this Earth family. And…hilarity ensues. GARY: Right, sure, I know. But what’s my motivation for this show we’re doin’?

No, it's a simile, dipschitt

My favorite Deep Thought: "One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. “Oh, no,” I said, “Disneyland burned down.” He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late."

"Other people have what they need; I alone possess nothing. I alone drift about, like someone without a home. I am like an idiot, my mind is so empty." - Lao Tzu

We don't dodge balls in this thread. We kick 'em!

That is good news

Brazil just fired their coach, Dunga. http://sbisoccer.com/2016/06/brazil-fires-dunga-after-underwhelming-copa-america-finish

Sorry, CBF. Portugal should have won. Birkir Bjarnason scored Iceland's first ever goal at a major tournament and got the draw.

Rettata will be entering that awkward phase and starting to feel those strange and wonderful stirrings from down below.

It surprised me. Although, I don't think Brazil has been dominant since they collapsed so shamefully in the World Cup two years ago.

Kill...Coldplay (the future will thank me) Marry...Tom Petty (sorry, Tom) F***...Ramsey Bolton (it wouldn't be boring)

I never liked this quote. It's just another dull & not very precise aphorism, trying to sound noble and badass. Paul should have stuck to paint'n & sculpt'n.

USA vs. Ecuador will be Thursday 6/16 at 9:30 pm ET, on FS1 Good test. Critical, important time for the USMNT.

The internet is mean

Not a great sign for the nation hosting the WC in 2018.

Very good win, 1-0. Down a man for just about the entire second half. I agree with the popular opinion that John Brooks was the man of the match. It was great to see. Brooks, if he stays healthy will be the real deal for the U.S. back line for years to come. He showed in this game that he is world class. Also, I think it's safe to say that Guzan has cemented his role as #1 GK. He has been outstanding. A little luck and help from Costa Rica upsetting Columbia means the U.S. wins the group. Their quarterfinal game will be on Thursday against the 2nd place team from group B (Peru, Ecuador or Brazil).

Group stage schedule: Friday, June 10 France vs. Romania -- Saint-Denis (3 p.m. ET, ESPN2) ________________________________________ Saturday, June 11 Albania vs. Switzerland -- Lens (9 a.m. ET, ESPN) Wales vs. Slovakia -- Bordeaux (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) England vs. Russia -- Marseille (/3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Sunday, June 12 Turkey vs. Croatia -- Paris (9 a.m. ET, ESPN) Poland vs. Northern Ireland -- Nice (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Germany vs. Ukraine -- Lille (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Monday, June 13 Spain vs. Czech Rep -- Toulouse (9 a.m. ET, ESPN) Rep of Ireland vs. Sweden -- Saint-Denis (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Belgium vs. Italy -- Lyon (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Tuesday, June 14 Austria vs. Hungary -- Bordeaux (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Portugal vs. Iceland -- Saint-Etienne (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Wednesday, June 15 Russia vs. Slovakia -- Lille (9 a.m. ET, ESPN) Romania vs. Switzerland -- Paris (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) France vs. Albania -- Marseille (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Thursday, June 16 England vs. Wales -- Lens (9 a.m. ET, ESPN) Ukraine vs. Northern Ireland -- Lyon (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Germany vs. Poland -- Saint-Denis (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Friday, June 17 Italy vs. Sweden -- Toulouse (9 a.m. ET, ESPN) Czech Rep vs. Croatia -- Saint-Etienne (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Spain vs. Turkey -- Nice (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Saturday, June 18 Belgium vs. Rep of Ireland -- Bordeaux (9 a.m. ET, ESPN) Iceland vs. Hungary -- Marseille (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Portugal vs. Austria -- Paris (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) ________________________________________ Sunday, June 19 Switzerland vs. France -- Lille (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) Romania vs. Albania -- Lyon (3 p.m. ET, ESPN2) ________________________________________ Monday, June 20 Slovakia vs. England -- Saint-Etienne (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) Russia vs. Wales -- Toulouse (3 p.m. ET, ESPN2) ________________________________________ Tuesday, June 21 Northern Ireland vs. Germany -- Paris (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Ukraine vs. Poland -- Marseille (12 p.m. ET, ESPN2) Croatia vs. Spain -- Bordeaux (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) Czech Rep vs. Turkey -- Lens (3 p.m. ET, ESPN2) ________________________________________ Wednesday, June 22 Hungary vs. Portugal -- Lyon (12 p.m. ET, ESPN) Iceland vs. Austria -- Saint-Denis (12 p.m. ET, ESPN2) Italy vs. Rep of Ireland -- Lille (3 p.m. ET, ESPN) Sweden vs. Belgium -- Nice (3 p.m. ET, ESPN2)

I heard "Rock the Casbah" yesterday and it made me smile.