Cugalabanza

You definitely take these big fundamental notions very seriously and you seem driven to think critically about them. I bet you will really like your philosophy classes very much.

Truth? I happen to be in the uniquely advantageous position of having an undergraduate philosophy degree and being an internet-ordained minister of a non-denominational interfaith church (in order to perform the wedding of a good friend of mine). Even more importantly, I am a Buffalo Bills fan. So, it is with these noble and lofty credentials that I can tell you that Truth is a big fat lump of horseshyte resting on the end of a dirty popsicle stick. Furthermore, at some point in your life, you will find yourself eagerly licking it in spite of yourself. If you are one of the lucky few, you will succeed in convincing yourself that it is delicious.

Objection! Assumes facts not in evidence! No more questions your honor. Speaking of the court room and magic, I sometimes tell people when they ask that I believe in God in a "Miracle on 34th Street" sort of way. I don't want to be the guy who says that magic does not exist and I definitely believe in the good things that are meant to be represented by it, but if you start asking questions about where exactly is God's mailing address at the North Pole, then yes, you are going to be very disappointed.

I hope you're right about Peters. I just don't know though--it doesn't feel like we're gonna here good news real soon. I don’t think there's really any suspense about our QB's. It will be Trent, JP and Gibran, in that order. And JP is staying where he is for this season because he is very good for this team in the backup role right now. There will be surprises for the final cuts, but not at QB. Anyway, I can't wait. I'm definitely feeling the fever!

Wow, all youngins today. Happy Birthday, you nutty bastards!

So does Hannah Montana.

Happy Birthday, Joe! You and Butler and Lewis started this whole thing for me.

If there is a God, then I don't see the value of having to be broken down to the point of total desperation in order to "turn to him." Reminds me of the old Dennis Miller quote, "nobody finds Jesus on prom night." Sorry, I just expect a little more from an all-powerful deity. Like maybe he could appeal to my sense of reason, for example, instead of house-breaking me like a puppy who peed on his rug. If you want to see me cry and beg, you don't need a god for that. You could achieve the same result with a couple thugs with some rope and a pair of pliers. Doesn't prove a damn thing.

Sure you can, as long as you look at life as a series of absurd but entertaining slapstick misadventures.

I didn't see your post when I mentioned fudgsicles. I think he should get both.

Fudgsicles. When was the last time you had fudgsicles?

I just go with the assumption that no one really knows what the hell he/she is talking about, including me.

I can't listen to this stuff at work. However my take is that the entire body of what can be called religious doctrine, all throughout history, is simply a collection of made-up answers to questions that people are afraid to admit they don't have real answers for.

Here's my favorite part...

Frances McDormand. She's in a lot of good stuff. Blood Simple and Short Cuts are favorites of mine.

Mr. Mohra: So, I'm tendin' bar there at Ecklund and Swedlin's last Tuesday and this little guy's drinkin' and he says, "So where can a guy find some action? I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake." And I says, "What kinda action?" and he says, "Woman action, what do I look like?" And I says, "Well, what do I look like, I don't arrange that kinda thing," and he says, "I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake," and I says, "Well, this ain't that kinda place." Officer Olson: Uh-huh. Mr. Mohra: So he says, "So I get it, so you think I'm some kinda jerk for askin'," only he doesn't use the word jerk. Officer Olson: I understand. Mr. Mohra: And then he calls me a jerk and says the last guy who thought he was a jerk was dead now. So I don't say nothin' and he says, "What do ya think about that?" So I says, "Well, that don't sound like too good a deal for him then." Officer Olson: Ya got that right. Mr. Mohra: And he says, "Yah, that guy's dead and I don't mean of old age." And then he says, "Geez, I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake." Officer Olson: White Bear Lake? Mr. Mohra: Well, Ecklund & Swedlin's, that's closer ta Moose Lake, so I made that assumption. Officer Olson: Oh sure. Mr. Mohra: So, ya know, he's drinkin', so I don't think a whole great deal of it, but Mrs. Mohra heard about the homicides down here and she thought I should call it in, so I called it in. End o' story. Officer Olson: What'd this guy look like anyway? Mr. Mohra: Oh, he was a little guy. Kinda funny lookin'. Officer Olson: Uh-huh. In what way? Mr. Mohra: Oh, just in a general kinda way.

dude, seriously

???????, WOW

I have as much respect for you right now as I have ever had, or ever will.

On this day a TBD legend was born. Happy Birthday!

Dammit! I was almost home free.

This just in… Nothing New To Report. Thank you. We now return you to your regularly scheduled reckless and irresponsible speculation.

What's disappointing to me is that, in the midst of all the talk about it being racially offensive (which I do not really care about), we are distracted from the fact that it is painfully and awkwardly unfunny. This is the part that offends me and I think the Spaniards should be held accountable not for being insensitive, but for being unimaginative humorless dullards--a harsher indictment in my opinion.

I'm not sure of the correct term for a plurality of bastards. I believe it's "gaggle." Happy Birthday you gaggle of bastards!

If they're cut short enough, you can see a little bit of the pockets sticking out. Hopefully that's the only thing sticking out.