Cugalabanza

Have a great birthday, Tarkus!

Is Beckham really gonna come back from his achilles tear? I haven't seen any updates. When he first got hurt, the consensus was that his career was cooked.

I think it's interesting to consider that period of a man's life when he does not have that intimate access to a woman's body, approximately age 2 to 18. You could make a very good argument that that's the best, most peaceful time of his (our) life. There's an irony there (or a paradox at least). And inside that irony is maybe an indication of the terrifying power that women wield against us.

Yes, and he accomplishes this by way of the specially patented Total Gym® system of cable and pulley things. Also, Christie Brinkley (the model, not the dog) is standing there smiling.

Hmmm... are you referring to the shape of your head or does this have to do with the path you take through life? (I think you meant "ellipsis.") (sorry, I had a bunch of caffeine and it sparked the smartass part of my brain)

What is this, semi-colon day? Easy there, Chomsky.

platypus**, I guess.

It's fun soliciting insults from Tom. Basically all you have to do is reply to anything he says. It's fun--you should try it.

How come you never go to that intersection? Is it because you're caught in traffic on I Pretend I'm Not Interested But I Can't Keep From Commenting Anyway Boulevard?

Well, physically she's pretty hot! I can't deny that. And actually it doesn't bother me that much that she's had a lot of partners. It's her unforgivably terrible taste in TV shows and shamelessly loud-mouthed, self-centered world view that makes me have to say NO.

Wow, they're way off! Tyson did not even make the Olympic team in '84.

I don't think I like your attitude, mister. Why don't you take a nice little trip, on a slow spiderboat to Guam?

wah!

Shhhhh...I win

Have a great Birthday, bofayooz!

I got it! C H A P L A I R U N D O E K E S

I just double-checked... actually what DC Tom said was that I was a world class moron and I should never speak or write anything down ever again. But he said it with such affection! And that World Class thing is pretty good, huh?

That's the nicest thing anybody's said to me since DC Tom admitted he was frightened and intimidated by my amazing intellect.

He raised a skanky whore broken arm bj bandit!

Don't let yourself get influenced by that nutjob. That stuff is ok for Beerball because he's in politics now, but regular working people have no need for that kind of depraved deviant filth.

Not exactly, but I find it interesting that that's where your mind went right off the bat.

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

You jackass! Don't you know that's how we got into this terrible economic situation? You're sitting there thinking you just got yourself a $.02 profit. You know what you got? A credit problem. A toxic asset! Nice job screwing it up for everybody.

This is so tragic. There is no need for hot young nannies to die like this. That's why I volunteer my services as a spotter to girls who like to engage in activities like this.

I will donate all of my proceeds from this thread to put Beerballs in the White house.