Simon

I'd bet dollars to doughnuts that he's California sober.

Do you happen to know how that rate compares to traditional kickoffs?

There's a few fellas over in the other Veteran's Day thread if you want to check in there also.

It contained zero information, zero insight and was nothing more than a woe is us LAMP, half of which was just you repeating two words of lyrics that you stole from Leonard Cohen. If you're desperate for it to be revived, PM me which of the "Fire McDermott" or "Beane Sucks" or "We're Doomed" threads you would like it to be merged into and I will see if I can dig it out of the bin.

Agreed. At the top of their respective games, Chan Gailey was a much better football coach.

The consulting firm was virtually irrelevant. I could make a reasonably cogent argument that Mike Tomlin indirectly had more to do with McDermott's hire than anybody outside the Bills organization.

This is true This is not true. When I say that Whaley wanted McDermott and pounded the table for him, it is not idle speculation or reading tea leaves. I was given first hand information that was who Doug was fighting for, prior to the hire.

Doug wanted him and fought hard for him to be hired. It was the first and only time in his tenure as GM that Pegula gave him who he wanted as a HC.

I don't know if you quite have to go there, but I was definitely b'ing and moaning early in the Dolphins game about them not making even the slightest bit of effort whatsoever to run the offense at any kind of pace.

Doug Whaley

It's probably not just a coincidence that some of Hurts' best performances have come when the Eagles had two weeks of prep time before a game.

He's never been a good passer but he has squeezed every drop of talent he could possibly get out of himself to become a better QB than I thought he'd ever be. Gotta respect him for that but he'll always have limitations as a pure QB, imo.

People are going to make fun of that game because of the scoreboard, but I think it was sort of underrated.

I actually thought that band had some fairly legit funk chops.

TIL that Fatboy Slim had enough pull at one point to get Bootsy Collins to work with him 🤯

At the risk of an ass-kicking, I kinda though it looked like Poona Ford at birth

Huge implications for playoff seeding on the line. It sort of has the feel of "Don't be the first guy to make a big mistake" right now. I'd guess a couple big plays could open things up pretty quick.

I don't know what the O/U was, but I don't think anybody was expecting a defensive battle. It's not windy up there, is it?

DYK that a Poona is a type of cucumber....

It's hip to be round

I want to say hip pad, but when I try to type it this keeps coming up....

I think the rule is that anybody on the LoS has to have their helmet at least aligned with the Center's hip and be no further back than that.

Definitely a haunting number. Old Ella felt bad, she didn't know what she had So she went down to see the old doctor. She tried to drop a load, but the tests they all showed An obstruction had gone up and blocked 'er. The doctor stood back and looked at that ass crack, Each butt cheek the size of a barrel. He slipped on his gloves and he pushed and he shoved In the rectum of Ella Fitzgerald. The search began strong: with some barbecue tongs He pulled out two plums and a melon. He then cried "Oh Lord" as he plucked out a gourd, And it looked just like Ian McKellan. And Lordy, that gourd it was smellin'. He stumbled and then almost fell in. And what he'll find next there's no tellin'. That gaping crevasse that was old Ella's ass Was a dark and forboding prospectus. He found two payphones, old Glen Miller's trombone, And the skull of a ***** erectus. And over there on the side, Jimmy Hoffa had died And he lay there all stinking and rotten. Then George Bush sent in troops to parade through the poop In the search for Osama bin Ladin. After one more good poke, the tongs they were broke, So he called for a pick and a shovel. He tried to be brave as he looked in that cave And he said "Lads, we might be in trouble... We're going inside of a hole brown and wide With an atmosphere surely not sterile. So strap on your mask, and we'll finish the task In the rectum of Ella Fitgerald." He reached in that muck and he pulled out a duck, Seven pheasants, a goose and a gander; A scale model train and an ultralight plane And a rusted but working belt sander. Then later, a used lunar lander. Their luck would soon change when they hired a crane And they pulled out that broken bulldozer. The people all cheered for her ass was now clear And the only job left was to close her. The fart that was cut when that ####### slammed shut Put the whole of the city in peril. I've heard it be said sixteen men were struck dead By the rectum of Ella Fitzgerald.

The irony of this coming at the end of a bunch of overwrought ranting about things that aren't even true is through the roof.

Enjoy the show but please keep this thread clear of any Bills commentary so that folks can just enjoy MNF without having to hear about how awful we looked yesterday. Thanks!