It doesn't matter where he goes. He starts out as a bum. Becomes the backup. And somehow the starter.
Then he explodes for big numbers and exciting play for a few games.
Next comes the contract extension
Then he sucks
It's Fitzmagic
Keep clicking your heels together and soon Hiliary will be President, Merrick Garland will be on the Supreme Court, and those pesky 1st, 2nd, 4th, 10th, and 22nd Amendments will go away
This line made me chuckle
Because yeah, Google is going to go ahead and delete that for you
All that freaky porn you've searched, every internet hookup site you signed up for, and every question you have posed to the all mighty Internet: once you start typing in that box it's never getting deleted.