This joke always goes over really well when I tell it.
A woman gets on a bus holding her baby. As she is fumbling for the correct fare the bus driver looks up and says, "Jesus, that is the ugliest baby I have ever seen." The woman is too stunned to answer. Tears spill down her cheeks as she pays the fare and goes to her seat. The guy in the seat next to her looks over and says, "Excuse me, but you seem upset, is everything okay?" The woman responds, "No, I'm not okay. The bus driver just said the rudest thing to me." "What did you say back?" asks the man. "Why, nothing. I was too hurt to speak." "Well, if you don't mind me saying, I've been taking lot of self improvement courses and I've learned that you can't take that sort of abuse quietly. It will eat you up inside. You need to march right back up there and give that bus driver a piece of your mind," the man tells her. "Do you really think so?" she asks.
"Absolutely! Here, I'll hold your monkey."