The Real Buffalo Joe

@BringBackFergy and are are down for signing Palmer as the new starter. Get that guy in there (He throws a sweet spiral), and see what Josh Allen is worth on the trade market.

I don't really want "quality control" so much as just making sure they already follow the laws on the books as far as false/misleading advertising, etc.

It pisses me off when anybody who has an "edgy" opinion on religion or politics, sticks the quote onto a picture of Carlin, implying that he said them. When often is the case, it's the exact opposite of what George really believed.

My views are even more controversial. Lol. Use all the drugs you want. Just know the American taxpayers aren't gonna save you when you overdose. As I've mentioned before, I believe basically all taxation is theft, and that inclues "sin taxes" like this one.

"Personally pro life, but politically pro choice" is an inconsistent view to hold. If you're personally pro life, that means that you understand that the unborn fetus is a child. So if you hold to this view, you're basically saying that you believe the child is a human being, but people should have the right to kill it anyway.

In order to appriciate Lenny Bruce, you have to understand his historical context. He was an absolute comic genius, and very edgy for his time, and pushed the envelope, carving the way for many comedians we know today, including Carlin. That said, because the envelope has been pushed much farther, and a lot of his stuff has been done, it doesn't come off the way it was supposed to, because we've been desensitized. I'd compare it to I Love Lucy. Obviously she wasn't controversial. But I remember hearing about how I Love Lucy was one of the greatest sitcoms of all time. When I watched i myself, I thought it was okay. But it was nothing I hadn't seen before. Until I learned the history. The reason I'd seen it all before, is because it all stemmed from Lucy.

I was friends with Nate in high school. Pretty cool seeing him succeed.

Reminds me of a Mitch Hedberg Joke. When you're in Hollywood and you're a comedian, everybody wants you to do other things. All right, you're a stand-up comedian, can you write us a script? That's not fair. That's like if I worked hard to become a cook, and I'm a really good cook, they'd say, "OK, you're a cook. Can you farm?"

I want to hire this guy for: The Music City Travesty, which was clearly a forward lateral. No goal. Multiple games involving the Patriots* and Bills, but the one that comes to mind is the Benjamin catch. When I was in little leauge Coach Pitch when I was 7 the umpire called me out at second because the kid touched the bag, but there wasn't anybody on first, so it wasn't a force out. Can he dig something up on Wide Right?

I've seen Caparulo live twice. Super nice guy. He's my brother's all time favorite comedian. I happened to see him on the night of my brother's birthday, who still lives up in Buffalo. He called him and wished him a happy birthday, and talked to him on my phone for like two minutes. Jeselnik is funny, and talented. But not my style. I don't mind shocking humor, but just shock for shock gets kinda old.

Yeah. Kathleen Maddigan is hilarious.

Yeah. I live in Houston, and about year ago, we got about 3 inches of snow. First thing I did was go to the supermarket. Not because the world was ending, I just needed a few things. People were panicking. I was in my Bills hoodie, and I saw a guy in a Steelers hat. We both just give each other this look like "Yeah, these people are nuts." My work basically said if you can make it, great, if not, stay home, it won't count against you. Being from Buffalo, I decided that I could handle it. So I'm getting ready, and the news shows all the traffic accidents. "That's on my way to work. That one is too. Oh hell, that's three just on my route." So I just stayed there and drank.

I was interested in all branches of the military, except for the Air Force for some reason. Which is ironic, considering I married into a family where my father in law was in the Air Force, and my brother in law is currently in. When I was in Boy Scouts, in 7th grade, it was right after 9/11. We took a tour of a Coast Guard base somewhere near Cleveland, and I was absolutely fascinated by the whole thing. If they would have let me join right then and there, I would have. Unfortunatly, I was the classic story of smart kid that was lazy in high school, so I was a straight C student, and the recruiter I talked to let me down gently, basically telling me not to waste my time. Then a friend of mine wanted the referal bonus, so I started talking to an army recruiter. He had some guys from my high school, and a few of the local ones come in once a week for physical fitness stuff, and teach us army strategy stuff. He asked me what my dream college was. At the time, I was pretty big into Notre Dame football, but knew I had no chance. Recruiter told me that if I joined the army, he could get me into Notre Dame, without tuition. My dad was totally against it. "He's full of it. You're just gonna get your @$$ shot off in Iraq of Afghanistan. Have you looked into the Navy?" So we talked to a Navy recruiter, and I decided that's where I wanted to go. But I was still way out of shape. So I decided to put the military off for a year, and take some courses at ECC. While I was there, I made a friend that's about ten years older than me. He was trying to get into the Marines, but had trouble with the ASVAB. Not because he wasn't smart, but the math he was taught, and the math I was taught, which is what was on the test. (No, not Common Core. I'm about three years too old.) So I helped him learn math, and he helped me work out. Went to the recruiting office with him. Talked to the recruiter while I was there, but honestly didn't have much interest. My heart was still set on the Navy. I went to the Navy recruiter. Took the ASVAB test, and basically aced it except the mechanical part. Recruiter said it was the highest score he'd ever seen. But when I got on the scale, he told me to come back when I lost more weight. I started working out. Got in decent shape, but lost interest in joining. Realized I was more or less looking to get away from home more than I really wanted a military career. Moved to Texas with my cousin, gained weight, and haven't looked back. Glad I didn't. Military wasn't for me. I even made friends with that army recruiter that told me he could get me into Notre Dame. We hung around a few of the same bars. He admit to me that it was his job to recruit me, but he knew from the get go that my personality just wasn't a good fit for the army.

Two questions. Again, I'm taking my time just fooling around, so haven't progressed much in the game. One: I've only played blackjack in Rhodes. Do other tables show up with higher stakes? 2¢ - $4.00 maximum bet isn't that much. Two: Everything I kill is one star. Is that because I'm killing them with a shotgun, or do the higher valued animals come later in the game. Another one that doesn't really bother me, but I did notice. There wasn't a tutorial for the poker, at least not that I remember. I know how to play, as any guy who was 15-40 in the mid 2000s went through a poker phase, but are those that don't know how to play just destined to make stuff up until they learn?

Sara Silverman was funny for a while. But she's kind of a one trick pony. Once you get over the cute, innocent seeming girl, saying dirty things, a lot of it stops being funny. I love Brian Regan. The one that he broadcast live was probably the best. His last one, I hate to say it, was really weak. Caliendo is hilarious. I watched Amy Schumer's entire special. Through the whole thing, I remember finding one thing very mildly funny. Not enough to laugh, but enough to think it might have been funny. Her problem is, even the rare times she gets to a joke that might be funny, her timing is so bad and she ruins it.

Every time he talks about things that Mexicans do, it always seems to be things that most people I know, regardless of ethnic background, did.

Mencia exists (existed) because his humor was racially based, so they saw him as a good replacement for Chappelle. Simple. His material is family friendly. I've heard he's actually a d!ck in real life though.

Not to mention, why the hell can't a passenger drink? He's not driving, let him drink all he wants as far as I care.

Forgot about Mitch.

When I was a cart boy back in high school I used to have one of those machines. So I'd have a row of about 20 carts. When I'd see someone leave their cart in their spot, I'd run over there, block their car in with my carts, and take my sweet ass time getting their cart on my line.

My all time favorite is Rodney Dangerfield. Of course Carlin, Eddie Murphy, Prior, Cosby (despite his background) are great. Some of the more modern ones I like are Bill Burr, Louis CK, John Mulaney. John Cappurllo. Overrated: Jeff Dunham. Amy Schumer. Kevin Hart. Never thought any of them were very funny. Kevin Hart has some good movies, but he's not that great in standup. We get it, you're short and black. Next.

I lived in an apartment up until recently, so I really didn't have to do much. Although I used to mow my aunt's yard for her just because I like doing it. Not much of a car guy, but when I first bought my used car, the battery died literally any time I left it off for more than an hour. I learned how to jump start it in under a minute, till I brought it to a mechanic to get the issues fixed. Also, out of necessity, I can change a tire. My brother is an auto mechanic and said to me once "I bet you don't even know how to change your own oil!" Sure I do. I take my car to Walmart, do some shopping, then give the guy $20.

Oh yeah. Looking back, we all find it hilarious.

I've had CPS called on both of my parents, granted one was kind of my fault. First time, when I was about four, I hit the little girl that I was playing with. My mom lightly slapped me and told me not to do it again. Later that weekend, I legit fell down the stairs, and got a black eye. Monday, I got to school, and when the teacher asked why I had a black eye, my response was "My mom hit me." The second time was total bullsh*t. I was about 8 or 9, so my brother was about 4 or 5. We went to McDonald's, and the drive thru was long, so my dad just went in and got the food. My brother and I played in the car, pretending we were driving. When my dad came out, he told my brother to get in the back seat, and motioned back, and then drove off. Pretty uneventful. Until a knock came on the door a few days later. Some lady took down my dad's licence plate. She called CPS and said that my dad left us in the car for 30 minutes, went into McDonald's, ate his food by himself (my dad hates McDonald's), then came back out, and hit my brother so hard that he fell into the back seat.

Strangely, I agree with about 75% of what you just said. That scares me. The majority of homeless people in the United States are there as a result of their own bad decisions.