LOL....I was gonna start with that but figured it wouldn't be much help to the OP!
To your point about the Bishop, you have to know your audience. If you're fundraising from a Denny's crowd, go cheap and take what you can get. If you are targeting people who will spend, you make it an appealing destination to get them to show up, and add an open (or partially open) bar to get them to loosen the purse strings. A few years ago in CT my wife raised >$100k with a silent/live auction night ---- for our public elementary school. No sob story cause there; we just needed a new playground, ipads in the classroom, etc., etc. Didn't hurt that the average household income in room was probably $200k and you got Type A guys into dick swinging contests bidding on someone's ski house for a week.
I'd always target the booze at those things figuring I'd do no worse than pay retail anyway and not look like a cheap ass.