Johnny Hammersticks

He seems like a good coach. I don’t hate him. Yet…

We play this game at my mother in law’s every Christmas where she wraps up like 25 presents. Most of them are cheap dollar store things, some are gag gifts like a roll of toilet paper or one rubber glove, but there are always some good gifts that they try to have the kids pick. I always find out which ones the good ones are and take them to piss everyone off. It’s funny to me. I always end up giving them to the kids, but it’s fun to frustrate everyone for a little while. 😂

A hockey dad friend of mine is an ER nurse at the local hospital. He has great stories about the different objects they extract from the orifices of men and women. Recently, he was talking about a sweet potato that was carved in the shape of a penis. It broke off in some woman’s “hoo-hoo” during sex with her partner. I guess it had been up there for a while before the woman finally decided to go to the hospital. There was another patient a few weeks ago, from the psychiatric wing, for which they extracted over ten batteries from his rectum. 😬

Perhaps even a private jet from Buffalo to Syracuse. Tanner Gentry and another practice squad player (I have no idea who he is) were also there.

Funny story. I spent 2 summers on Martha’s Vineyard working at a fancy tennis club called the West Chop Club. Bartending, waiting tables, maintenance, etc…. This was like 2002-2004. There were several celebrities who were members, and we would see celebrities all over the island. This one morning I went with a friend to the beer store to pick up our beer for the night. All the employees were young, and all of the female servers were European and HOT. It was great. Anyway, we had about 4-5 cases of beer on the counter ready to pay, and we heard a familiar voice coming from behind us saying “I got that Bill.” It was Michael J. Fox telling the store owner he wanted to pay for our booze. We both shook his hand (which was very shaky) and thanked him profusely. He shot the breeze with us for a few minutes. Really cool guy.

I don’t have any problems when I shave my face fully. I think the irritation on my neck when I try to grow a beard and trim around my jaw line if from the stubble rubbing against the freshly shaved skin on my neck. It’s not ingrown hairs. The do those old timey shaves with the brush and whatnot at my barber shop. I’ll have to give it a try sometime. Looks relaxing.

I use the foam, yeti. What are you talking about? 😂

I tried Harry’s razors one time. No bueno. The old school foam is definitely the play. I get the generic Walmart version though. If you can find the menthol…bonus!

How DARE you sir!!! This is serious! Interesting thought. I do shave with the grain. My facial hair does grow in different “directions” on different areas of my face. Neck is shave down. Always has been. Haven’t changed since I started growing my beard. I shaved it off yesterday bc it just became annoying though. I might try again and just let the neck portion grow out over the holiday break.

Yes. My son lights them right before kickoff. Definitely a game day ritual. I use the cheap foam shaving cream, but disposable razors are rough. Yikes!

Now we need to start threads for all of Josh Allen’s body parts 🙄

I’ve only been growing it since last Wednesday 😂 Here’s a bad juju question though. My wife got me these candles last year for Christmas. There is Josh Allen, Stefon Diggs and Cole Beasley. All season I’ve only been lighting the JA and Diggs candles. Should I light the Beasley one this Saturday or no? This is something that’s actually causing me anxiety 😆

Sounds like my uncle, Spider. His chest hair looks like taco meat.

I have tried electric razors several times. Not for me. I just shaved my beard off. It appears that there is a 1-2 week “phase” where my beard gets itchy as hell and my neck breaks out. I don’t have time for that ***** right now. Maybe next winter 😂 Thanks for the advice, everyone…

I think this might be the answer! I don’t use any aftershave. I use the basic foam shaving cream and a light face lotion recommended by my dermatologist.

Good tips. I never clean my razor, but if that were the problem wouldn’t my neck/face “break out” when I shave normally like I do the other 330 days of the year? Never tried one. I use a Mach 5 or something. Try to change the blade every couple weeks or so. Maybe I’ll give it a go.

Perhaps 🤔

So, I usually shave my entire face every morning, but in the winter I like to grow out my beard for a couple months. Started to grow it out last week. The only part of it I shave is down on my neck to tidy up the bottom. Here is my confusion. When I shave my entire face I never get razor bumps/irritation, but when I just shave just that little section on my neck above my Adams Apple it breaks out like crazy and gets irritated. Using same shaving products and shaving in the same direction as usual. Nothing different. Does anyone know why this might be?

Drove from Vermont last season for the Falcons game. Headed in Saturday night and stayed over night at a friend’s house in Rochester. Went to the game the next morning and drove back to VT after the game. About 7 hour drive from my house to the stadium.

Yeah, I’ve done Mansfield, Mt Abe, Killington, and Camel’s Hump. I just stick to the trails. Never had a problem.

I’ve hiked 4/5 of the 4,000+ footers in Vermont and never once felt as though I was in danger. Some people are just idiots.

What is wrong with or you?

Christmas Vacation Elf Home Alone Honorable Mention: Four Christmases

Get him in the summer time too. Buy a pound of shrimp and throw it up in his rain gutter. After a couple days he’ll be going crazy trying to figure out where the vile stench in coming from. Very few stinks worse than rotting shrimp 🤢