Johnny Hammersticks

My Mother in law puts raisins and diced apples in her turkey stuffing. WTF is wrong with that ****?? I can’t even smell the stuff w/o dry gagging.

Doesn’t Pat Mahomes look like he was in DeBarge?

Someone is putting their vocabulary word of the day calendar to good use.

If I got sued every time I forced my co-workers to breathe soiled air...well...I’d get sued a lot. I sometimes get caught up writing a report or something, forget I am at work, and cut one loose.

No preference. I like em both equally.

Jeez...you are high maintainance.

Battle to return. I believe it’s official. I am stunned. Ummm...yeah, no. But go UBUFF....

Daddy Battle is tweeting that no official decision has been made ??

My great aunt Kiki used to visit us for Christmas every year. She was a horrible drunk, and would put back a handle of Seagrams gin like it was her job. Two years in a row, she got hammered up and tore down all the shelves in our upstairs bathroom (apparently trying to prevent herself from falling). Each year after, my father took down every shelf, picture, or other wall hanging in the entire house. Man...that woman could drink. RIP Aunt Kiki.

Interesting. What image did you learn to project? My fav was the dog shadow puppet, but I’m not sure what kind of impact that had on my face value IQ.

Much to my surprise. I received an email from my AD today, and despite our forfeit, we actually made state playoffs as the 12th seed (out of 13). We play up north (about 10 miles from the Canadian border) on Wednesday against the reigning state champs in my division. Going to be a slaughter, but it’s cool to get invited to the dance. Last year, we won our first playoff game in program history. I’m happy for my players...there are some really good kids on my team. Pseudonymn Paul has played his last game this season. I will have a heart to heart with him tomorrow at practice....provided he shows.

I have never had anything but good experiences with HD customer service. This is Vermont, however, and they’re probably all very stoned and happy.

I hope you’re just busting balls at this point, EIL ??

You’re ridiculous. You can’t skip a varsity sport game...the last game of our season...our senior game!!! To go fishing and have a bonfire!!! Are you freaking kidding me with this absurdity?? You are banned from this thread. Go open a lock or something...

It’s not my personal FB page, and I do not treat it as such. None of the “friends” of the Schmarnaw Valley Lacrosse Facebook page are family members or friends of mine. I use it to communicate information pertaining to the team (e.g., practice times, cancellations) to players and parents. Every once in a great while I will comment on a player or alums page if they post about a great achievement or something like that. In this case, I was acknowledging his awesome day of fishing. Brook trout season is a huge deal up here ?

This is Vermont, man. No such policies exist, or better I say...are enforced. I am an educator as well, and one of our biggest problems is truancy. Sure, we have policies in place, but ultimately they are never enforced. Even when reported to DCF they don’t do anything. In this case, his parents were allowing him to stay home and would call his absence into school. Again, not the most “skilled” parents in the world, and certainly no importance placed on education, character, or committment in this family. I’m no being judgmental. It just is what it is.

It is. That is why he was only eligible for about 5/13 games this season anyway.

I would respect him a great deal more if he were honest. Even if that meant telling me to $&@# off. ? He’s a sophomore who will likely be a sophomore again next year.

? Sad thing is there will be a varsity pin waiting for him at our end of year banquet, but I doubt he will show now. I’m not going to confront him unless he decides to come out for the team next year. Now I have some leverage and can institute a zero tolerance policy with him.

What ever happened to being a man, going to your coach, and saying “coach, lacrosse is just not my priority right now and I just can’t commit to being part of this team, so I’m going to hand in my gear.”??

This makes absolutely no sense to me. If you don’t want to play a sport and you want to go camping or fishing, that’s fine, but don’t sign up to play a varsity sport then.

Many 6 year olds at the schools where I work can’t even identify all of their letters. Back in the day they called that ****ty parenting. Today they refer to it as “acquired dyslexia.” Not kidding.

Eh, karma’s a b***h man. I never said NYC, and if you know Vermont, NY state is only a 30-40 minute drive from where I live. Kids go there all the time. Was what I did “passive aggressive” as you say? Maybe. But if he were telling the truth then my seemingly innocuous FB comment would have been insignificant.

I wish I could have confronted him earlier, but I never had any grounds to do so. His lies to get out of practice usually were “coach, I’ve been throwing up all night so I had to stay home from school.” Then I would have his friends/teammates tell me that he was out playing basketball when he was supposed to have school. I had no proof other than heresay, so I never had a solid reason to confront him. His parents didn’t give a crap that he was missing school, and he was probably lying to them too. I couldn’t call his parents to verify. The other one he used often was “coach, I have a dentist appointment at 5:15 (we practice 5-7), and I’m probably going to have some work done so I won’t be able to make it to practice.” Now, I found it interesting that anyone would have a doctor/dentist appointment that late in the day. I went to my AD and ran it by him, and he said that there are some providers in the county that accepted Medicaid and took appointments into the early evening due to the volume of patients they need to see. Again, his “friends” would tell he was lying and skipping practice, but what was I supposed to do? Call his parents and confirm that he actually had a dentist/doctor appointment? I don’t think so. The thing is, I have had several conversations with him about his “commitment to the team” and carefully call into question his frequent absence from practice and the impact on the team. He would always just shrug it off. “Sorry coach, it has been a rough semester and I have been sick a lot.” He actually is a pretty charismatic kid. Probably a budding sociopath. I actually have pretty strict policies about missing practice/games, but this kid always found ways to skirt around them. For example, there are only four acceptable reasons to miss practice; you’re sick and cannot attend school, family emergency, academic obligation (e.g., honor society induction), or significant religious committment (e.g., first communion). Any “no call-no show” regardless of the excuse resulted in loss of playing time. I adhered to that very closely. This kid just always managed to get around the rules in the handbook.

I know! The balls on that kid! He’s not a very good liar.