I know I've come late to the party but I must chime in...First John, sorry about your son, hopefully it will work out and he can continue to play.
Secondly, ans you are right on...not everyone can relate to John in this thread, but I sure can, because of what I'm going through with my son, he plays basketball. He's had more than his share up twists and turns along the way, good grades, bad grades and other typical teenage things...He's had varying degrees of projections from people about his college prospects D3 to D1... Hearing these kinds of things about your kid from coaches or scouts is something unlike anything else...if he got injured or failed to make it I would feel as crushed as he would, is that living vicariously through him? I want him to achieve what is possible for him.
My son knows he won't be playing in the NBA, he loves the game, he has a passion for the game...that's why he wants to play in college...to him right now, the education part is a pain in the ass, he doesn't excel or fail, he gets by. He doesn't like school, never has. Am I happy with that? Hell no, but that's who he is, that's his decision. I don't ride him about his grades, I've found that to be counter productive. If he screws it up that's on him. Maybe that makes me a bad dad too.
John's son had a dream, he wanted to help him realize the dream, that is not living vicariously through him...he shares his son's victories and defeats...he's a proud Dad that obviously loves his kids...it's as simple as that. I completely understand and wish him the best.