SageAgainstTheMachine

Does somebody else want to make the joke? Because I am not gonna go there...

Best driving advice I ever got was from my gramps...assume that the guy in front of you, and the guy behind you, and the guys to your right or left, are all going to do something idiotic at some point, and probably simultaneously.

What a country. Burress hurt nobody except for himself, but he's going to spend more time in prison than Michael Vick and Donte Stallworth combined. Not saying Burress doesn't deserve a short stint behind bars, but 2 years is overkill IMO.

And I have to stick by what I said that you might just not be looking in the right places. While I admit that I don't like the direction toward which modern TV comedy is headed, there are plenty of high quality dramas out there. Weeds, The Wire, Mad Men, Lost, Breaking Bad, 24 (though it's gone downhill a little), The Shield, just to name a few stellar shows. On top of that, people tend to remember things from the past more fondly than they actually considered them in the present. Was Married With Children REALLY any more funny than Arrested Development, 30 Rock, Eastbound and Down, etc? Probably not, if you watch them side by side. But a lot of people seem to remember it that way.

Oh, well he's correct about the dearth of sitcoms, but he also said "all scripted tv shows", which I disagree with wholeheartedly. The only 3 sitcoms I truly look forward to are 30 Rock, South Park and It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. I also watch stuff like The Office, Simpsons, Big Bang Theory, Family Guy...but those are just for fun, none of them are particularly hilarious IMO.

False. There's tons of great TV out there, especially if you let yourself stray from the NBC, CBS, ABC comfort zone.

But you have to pay extra if you want to take one of the animals into the back room behind the beaded curtain.

So if we don't win the Superbowl this year, it's because of the curse of Ryan Neill.

Interceptions are meaningful. The interceptions statistic is deceptive and virtually meaningless, compared to other metrics into which the average fan doesn't care to delve.

Your daughter not only knows what the backup Bills offensive linemen look like, but got excited about seeing him... Does she have a number?

Maybe he didn't suck for a benchwarmer, but the notion that he's a "playmaker" because he got 3 INTs last year is completely fallacious.

Baker was awful. The INT is perhaps the most meaningless and incomplete of all mainstream NFL statistics.

It doesn't matter what the ______ is, if you "________ and drive", it's gonna be bad news. Drinking and driving. Texting and driving. Talking on your cell and driving. Applying makeup and driving. Smoking and driving. Eating and driving. Blasting music and driving. Anybody ever heard of DRIVING and driving? While there is a major stigma around drinking and driving, it absolutely amazes me that it is considered acceptable to be preoccupied by anything while you're attempting to guide thousands of pounds of metal down the highway at 70 MPH. When I was six, my Mom was almost killed in an auto accident by a drunk driver(still suffers from the side effects to this day), and my blood just boils when I see a soccer mom driving a minivan with her kids in the back, taking a puff of her cigarette and talking on her cell, all the while trying to balance her coffee on the dashboard.

There's a difference between getting excited and overreacting and having a predetermined stunt like TO's sharpie or Joe Horn's cell phone. There's no place in the game for that, but when it comes to shouting, dancing, spiking the ball...I like it.

Normally it would irk me too...but for a team that just hasn't been exciting for a decade, it's almost refreshing to see somebody show some overt swagger (even if it's over the top).

Well obviously, nothing beats google. But say you're out at the bar, and you have a drunk argument about the longest punt of all time, or who the drummer for the Talking Heads was...Cha cha can tell you.

Use cha cha instead, it's free. They just hit you with a couple ads via text.

In a 2 RB league? Unless you're the best trader in the world, you can't justify drafting a non-starter in the 3rd round.

Projections like this are worth about as much as the load I just flushed down the porcelain chair.

Is this a 1 QB league? If so, you should try to trade Eli Manning. No point in having a top-15 QB stagnating on your bench if he'll only start on Donovan's bye week.

One month from today, we'll all wake up with that familiar feeling of excitement/doom...since it's a Monday, we'll all go about our normal days but won't REALLY be focused on anything but sitting our asses down in front of the TV at 7 o clock. One month.

Thanks for the comments everybody...I'm aware that $8 is pretty small potatoes in the shoplifting realm, but it's still a pretty tricky moral dilemma.

Or I could just have my boss canned for going on 45 minute "cigarette breaks" on top of his 30 minute lunch, and frequently leaving a single customer service representative to run the store.

Yeah, this is what I fear...a few minutes after the fact, I got the distinct impression that I was outsmarted by a punk kid.

I didn't actually hear the conversation, as there were other customers waiting at the time and I was multi-tasking. He definitely talked to somebody, maybe he was just faking it like Fezmid thinks. In any case, he intimated that his parents weren't going to bail him out.