Wow just read this all, I had a 2 year relationship with a woman once in Korea, I ended up moving there and it didn't work out, so I feel for you. I have some advice. Dude, you have 2 useless degrees, go to Korea and teach English (2000$ a month or more, have to be careful about the jobs there but it can be good) and stop going to school. Or do what my friend in Korea did and move to NYC and start a rooftop garden business, stop being so freaking poor and experience the world a bit. Best to you and don't worry about losing one, there are billions of women in the world. Basic math says you have a chance to get your willy wet again.
BTW I also had a woman friend once who said that once a long distance relationship crossed a state line, she was doing who and whatever she wanted. I kind of like that in hindsight.